


Bitter Silence

by Lightan117



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Backstory, Character Development, Everyone lives, F/M, Magic, Magic necklace, Mental Breakdown, Temporary Character Death, Thorin Is an Idiot, Thorin is a Softie, Torture, shit gets real, sort of a slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2019-06-05
Packaged: 2019-09-01 08:53:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 25,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16761943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lightan117/pseuds/Lightan117
Summary: "I wonder if death will always taste this good" - Given a second chance from the horror she lived with for years; Lena is thrown into a world she used to escape to when the day couldn't get any worse. Now, her mission is to change an ending or die knowing she couldn't stop it. Out of the pan and into the fire as they say. Little does the company know; she's already been through it.





	1. Prologue

**"There will come a time when all of us are dead. All of us. There will come a time when there are no human beings remaining to remember that anyone ever existed or that our species ever did anything. There will be no one left to remember Aristotle or Cleopatra, let alone you. Everything that we did and built and wrote and thought and discovered will be forgotten and all of this will have been for naught. Maybe that time is coming soon and maybe it is millions of years away, but even if we survive the collapse of our sun, we will not survive forever. There was time before organisms experienced consciousness, and there will be time after. And if the inevitability of human oblivion worries you, I encourage you to ignore it. God knows that's what everyone else does." ― John Green, The Fault in Our Stars**

~oOo~

She couldn't remember the last time she was happy.

She couldn't remember the last time she smiled, last time she was truly asked if she was okay, or the last time she was able to give someone a hug without flinching. She can't remember a time when she had friends to go out with, or anytime before... _he_ came into her life and decided to stay. A time where she didn't have to hide marks on her body or the pain on her face when someone knocks into her.

She didn't have a dark secret then...

And she's lost so much...

Given up so much...

Her story begins like any other story. She was born to happy parents; on a certain day of a certain month on a certain year on a certain time. She's nothing special really. She has ten fingers and toes like everyone else with auburn hair and light brown eyes. To her parents; she was the world but to everyone else...

She was a nobody...

As she grew she started to learn the horrors of life quite early. She lost her father first, around the young age of six to a robbery gone wrong. He was claimed a hero but she didn't want to see him as a hero but rather alive and still reading her bedtime stories. After a year or so her mother remarried to a brute of a man who adored her mother.

Not her.

One day, she learned to fear him. She screamed at him, anger turning her face red as she did. She yelled at her stepfather that he was a liar; that he didn't like her at all and that he wasn't a father to her. She hated him.

She received her first slap...

The first of many to come...

Her mother found out but he said that she needed to be put in her place. Her mother was disgusted but said nothing. Her mother was afraid too and she didn't want to pick sides. However, she did pick a side one way or another. The side of death for she was taken away by a fetal car crash; one of which the girl was the only survivor. At the funeral, when a hand rested on her shoulder, it squeezed in a most painfully way as they lowered her mothers body into the ground did she know that she signed her life away.

A life of fairy tales and princes and kings were no more...

A tale of locked doors at night, people seeing but never asking the real questions.

Over the years that passed she escaped anyway she could. Through books and music. Through her school work and drawings. She wanted to be a doctor; to help people who would hide just like her. She wouldn't be the ones to remain quiet; to sit by and watch as they waste away in their pit of darkness. Her mother would be turning in her grave if she knew what the man was doing to her.

The bruises...

The cuts...

The nightmares that would keep her up at night for she fears _he_ would come and kill her while she slept.

The one night...

She could not take it any longer...

She snapped...

And that would be the last thing she'd ever do...

All of a sudden she felt pain in her neck and it got so hard to breathe until the last thing the girl remembered was the color orange everywhere like she was swimming in soda pop; her hands hurting from banging on something before all went dark. A ringing sounded, something was cracking and falling away as she faded away.

Only she wasn't afraid of the dark...

She embraced the freedom...

The darkness was warm and she felt finger run through her hair while whispering something but she couldn't understand the words being spoken. It sounded like a woman by the way her voice chimed like bells and how softly the fingers ran through the girl's hair. It reminded her so much of her mother...

The voice spoke softly one last time before she felt herself slipping even further down into the warm darkness...

~oOo~

" _Good morning everyone, and welcome to channel 7 news. We have a rather sad story for you all this morning. Around ten o'clock last night a fire broke out, spreading to the three homes on either side where the fire originated; injuring three with only one causality, a young woman by the name Lena King. Upon further investigation by the fire department, the woman killed was the stepdaughter of the owner of where the fire originated. Investigators also revealed that the fire showed no signs of accidental cause for lighter fluid was found near Kings body. Police are also looking for Kings stepfather who may be tied to her dead who disappeared from the scene shortly after it stared. We'll keep you updated as the investigation progresses."_


	2. Arrival

" **A woman has to live her life, or live to repent not having lived it."** **―** **D.H. Lawrence**

~oOo~

Lena woke to the sound of a beating heart and fingers raking through her hair. The breath she thought she would never breathe in again seemed to catch in her throat as the same voice from before chuckled in her ear. Her body wouldn't move and her heart began beating faster and faster inside her chest.

" _Easy little one. Calm your beating heart. You are safe here._ " The voice said, a woman's voice. " _Now, listen to me, we don't have much time. I have watched you since the moment you were born little one and this is my gift to you but you must listen closely. You know this story, you've read the ending. You must change the ending in order for your second chance to be permanent or else the magic will wear off and you'll die forever. We will meet again."_ The woman slipped something into Lena's hand and then planted a kiss on her forehead. " _I believe in you. Good luck._ "

Then a bright light shone behind Lena's eyes and next thing she knew she heard the sound of birds chirping and the soft sensation of the grass beneath her fingers. Opening her eyes slowly she looked around to find herself alone and in the middle of the forest. Her head felt like cotton balls were shoved into her brain as she staggered to her feet, her hand clenching a sealed letter in old parchment. It was sealed with a red wax seal that just so happened to have a certain wizards name on it. Lena noticed that the clothes she was wearing were covered in soot and the memories from the night before flashed in her head; causing tears to come to her eyes as she covered her mouth to stifle her sobs. She truly did die didn't she?

 _He_ killed her...

 _He_ tried to cover it up...

Then she heard a voice, singing softly in the distance and Lena knew she couldn't stay in this woods for much longer; fearing her safety as she choked on some air trying to calm herself down. Just taking one step toward a voice in the distance she fell to her knees, her strength almost gone from the horror of what had happened. Her nerves were on edge and she wanted to scream but no sound would come out. Taking deep breaths she tried again. She got back on her feet again, adjusting her scarf around her neck and grabbing her school pack that sat a few feet away from her, she staggered towards the voice. The voice happened to be a very old man dressed in gray robes with a staff and a pointy hat. He was singing or humming a cheery song and Lena smiled when she recognized the voice.

Gandalf the Gray.

Lena tried to get his attention but it seemed like her voice refused to work; only coming out in garbled mess and grunts in pain. Only when she started to have a coughing fit did the wizard hear her. He came towards her, eyeing her up and down like she was a tear in a painting. Hidden and yet you know something is wrong. When he stopped in front of her, asking what in the world was a girl like her doing in the woods Lena brought up the letter and gave it to him. Gandalf took the letter from her, opening it up to read what was inside. His eyes widened and when he was done reading he told her that she is to accompanying him to the home of a certain hobbit who lived in the Shire only a mile down the road. Lena nodded her head and followed the wizard with a smile.

"Take heart dear girl. You are being looked after and we will sort things out once we get to the Shire. Bilbo is a kind soul and will look after you once I leave, assuming you know what is to happen in the coming months?" Gandalf asked and Lena nodded her head softly. "Good, now pull down your scarf and let me see the damage. I might be able to do something for you, maybe dull the pain?" Lena pulled down her scarf to show Gandalf her neck. Lena flinched when his hands turned warm and it soothed the pain in her neck but he said that the damage is already done. Only time will tell when she will gain her voice back.

Upon arriving at the Shire, Lena gazed in awe at the beauty of it. It was just as colorful as it was written in the books and displayed in the movies. She smiled when Gandalf told her to stop gawking and hurry it along. Lena felt bad as they passed hobbits, her appearance was nothing to smile about and she kept her head down; sweater in place and her scarf covering her neck. Within minutes they stood in front of a hobbit hole where a hobbit was relaxing; smoking his pipe with a smile on his face till his smoke ring turned into a butterfly, flying right into the hobbits face.

"Good morning." The hobbit said in a caution of politeness.

"What do you mean?" Gandalf asked. "Do you mean to wish me a good morning or it is a good morning wither I want it to or not? Or perhaps you mean to say that you feel good on his particular morning? Or are you saying that is a morning to be good on?"

"All of them at once I suppose?" the hobbit looked confused and Lena didn't blame him, the wizard can be something of a rather questionable person. Always full of riddles and cryptic nature. "Can I help you?"

"That remains to be seen. I'm looking for someone to share in on an adventure." Gandalf said and the hobbit's mouth dropped open, causing Lena to smirk.

"An adventure? No I don't imagine anyone west of Bree who would have much interest in adventures." The hobbit got up to check his mail. "Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things. Make you late for dinner." the hobbit tried to look busy as he flipped through the letters, smoking his pipe once more. "Good morning."

"To think that I should be 'good morning' to by Belladonna Tooks son, like I was selling buttons at the door."

"I peg your pardon?"

"You've changed and not entirely for the better Bilbo Baggins."

"I'm sorry do I know you?" Bilbo asked.

"Well you know my name although you don't remember I belong to it. I'm Gandalf and Gandalf means...me."

"Not Gandalf the wondering wizard who made such excellent fireworks, old Took used to have on mid-summers eve. No idea you were still in business." Bilbo said and the smile that was on Gandlf's face dropped.

"And where else should I be?" Gandalf asked and yet the hobbit didn't answer but shrug, waving his pipe in the air before clearing his throat.

"Well I'm pleased to find that you remember something about me even if it is only my fireworks." Gandalf glanced at me. "Well that's decided. It will be very good for you and most amusing for me. I shall inform the others while Lena here stays with you until I return. Would you be mindful to take her to town so that she might replace the things she lost on her travel? She cannot talk very much." Gandalf said but Bilbo didn't hear him and made a fuss about it before going inside; slamming the door close. Lena turned towards Gandalf but he said to look in her bag for money of some kind. Lena rolled her eyes, thinking that her money wouldn't work but in-place of her wallet that sat in the bottom of her bag was a rather large bag of gold coins. "Thought so. Seems as though your money converted into our currency thanks to your friend. Now, while I am away, go into town with Bilbo to see if you can find something to buy until we reach Bree when we leave. That town will have more of your size than the hobbits." Gandalf said and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Take heart dear girl, you will not be alone for long. We will see each other soon." With that the wizard walked up to the door to scratch in a rune so that the dwarfs will know that this is the hole to stop in. When Gandalf was gone Lena knocked on the door until said hobbit threw it open, shocked to see the girl standing before him.

"I'm...sorry..." Lena croaked. "Need...help..." Bilbo was shocked when the girl's voice came out and feel bad for slamming the door in her face.

"Forgive me miss, I'm not being much of a host. Please, come in and get yourself cleaned up." Lena walked into the house, giving the hobbit a smile when he showed her around his hole with passion and pride in his voice. She mouth sorry when he stopped talking but Bilbo shook his head, handing her a towel and an old dress that belonged to his mother that would do until she got new ones. The ones she had, had burn holes and just in poor condition that it was a shock the clothes were still in one piece. "My prideful and thick head got into the way when I should be helping you in such a state. That old wizard just ruffled my feathers a bit. Now, you get yourself cleaned up and we'll go to the market. I'll be in the kitchen if you need me." Bilbo said before he left her alone.

Lena walked into the bathroom and undressed; running the hot water into the tube before stepping in. It didn't take long for the water to turn black from the soot and dirt. After washing her hair the best she could and her body she stepped out, draining the water before wrapping herself up in the towel.

That's when she saw herself in the mirror.

A cut was under her left eye and a slight bruise was forming there as well. But what really made tears come to her eyes were the dark hand prints that were plastered on her neck. They were dark and ugly; bringing up her unwanted end to flash in her head. That man was a monster and he did this to her. Lena backed away from the mirror to slide down the wall behind her, never ending tears running from her eyes. She broke down then, everything catching up to her in that moment and when she threw up what little was in her stomach into the toilet. Once she got a hold of herself she picked herself up again.

Getting dressed in a dark blue dress with long sleeves, Lena tried to clean up what she could keep which happened to be her undergarments, socks, scarf, her flats and sweater; she ditched the rest in the waste bin sitting next to the sink. As she was cleaning up did she notice that something was inside her tattered jean pocket.

Her mother's necklace.

That man took it away from her after her mother died and she never saw it again until now. It was nothing special of course. Just a glass orb wrapped in metal leaves that sat perfectly between her breasts. Inside the glass orb however was something special. Her mother told a story when her when she was very little that the magic inside the orb was very powerful and that if the glass ever shattered, a person whose heart is very pure and true could use it or else the power would be corrupt. Of course, it was just a story passed down from her mother's side of the family. There's no magic...not in her world of course but then again she wasn't in her world. It made Lena laugh to think that this simple necklace could be magic but Lena brushed it away before putting it on.

Once ready, adjusting her scarf around her neck so that the marks were carefully covered. She walked to the kitchen with her book-bag over her shoulder. Bilbo smiled at her and together they left for town; Bilbo talking mostly while Lena listened.

Bilbo introduced Lena to the dress/clothes maker in town. The woman took a liking to Lena in an instant with a soft smile on her face. The woman felt sad for Lena when she saw how roughed up she looked. The old hobbit woman helped Lena find a cloak, undergarments, two shirts, and some pants that would need just a slight hem to them. As for shoes, she would have to wait until Bree to get actual shoes since hobbit have no need for them...big feet and all. Bilbo seemed to be on edge whenever Lena looked over. He freaked out on another hobbit when he asked if he had seen a wizard in town. Lena shook her head and just smiled.

Later in the night Lena was put to the test.

Very loud dwarves that ran around the hobbits hole with laughter and smiles. At first, Dwalin didn't think much of her while Balin thought she was very young and sweet. She could tell that their eyes always lingered a little too long on her face, the cut and bruise looked nasty on her pale skin. Fili and Kili took a great interest in Lena by pestering her and answering questions when the other dwarves arrived. She wrote on a sheet of paper with her pen, explaining in the note what a pen was, that she was a medical student until a friend of Gandalf's told her that she must join them on their journey. Gandalf filled in what she couldn't answer. He told the dwarves that Lena was from a far off place that was very different than theirs. There was hardly any magic and people were more practical with how things are done. Gandalf also explained that Lena was attacked on her way here, causing her to lose her voice from injury so she would have to answer them with writing things down. Oin also took great interest in her when he read that she was a medical student. She even showed him to look at her medical book that she had in her book-bag. Lena was still surprised that her bag managed to follow her into her world. Inside were her school books, her pencil/pen case, her little stuffed tiger she kept in the left pocket that her grandma gave her on her death bed (just a small thing that she bought at a drug store that really didn't mean much but meant the world to Lena), a notebook full of random notes, and of course...

 _That_ book.

Lena gave the hobbit book to Gandalf as soon as she saw him. He smiled at her, saying that a thing such as this should be kept away and Lena knew he was right. Change one thing and the whole story could go wrong. That was the last thing she wanted.

Dinner went along just as it did in the book. Singing, a burping contest, and laughter made Lena's sides hurt from where she sat between Balin and Bofur. The two dwarves were very nice to her, helping her reach her food and asking yes or no questions so it was easy for her to answer. When the mention of weapons were brought up she shook her head, writing in her notebook that she wanted to be a healer or helper rather than a fighter. Oin loved Lena even more for that but some of the other men agreed that Lena needed to learn something if she would be coming along with them.

That is if Thorin allowed her...

Speaking of said dwarf...

When he arrived after the group of dwarves sang about what Bilbo hates, Balin asked Lena to get something for Thorin to eat and drink, seeing as he was late to dinner. She smiled sweetly before going back into the kitchen to get Thorin a bowl of stew and a mug of ale. When she returned she was stunned that he was just as handsome as he was pictured in both the book and the movies. Richard Armitage was an amazing actor who played Thorin very well. Lena's read enough posts on the internet that people agreed that his voice can melt butter.

Lena placed the bowl in front of the dwarf king but when their hands touched, Thorin politely taking the mug from Lena's hands, did a warmth spread across their skin. Thorin and Lena looked into each others eyes and for the first time in the dwarven kings life did he almost forget what he was going to say. The woman that stood next to him was someone he never thought he would ever find in his life time or ever for that matter.

Thorin wanted to know everything about the woman and just take her in his arms, saying any random romantic thing that came to his mind but when his eyes landed on the marks on her face did his gut run cold. He hid his anger well as the woman sat between Balin and Bofur, thinking of many possible ways to harm whoever or whatever made those marks on her face for Lena was special to him.

Lena as it turns out...was his One...little did Lena know...


	3. PTSD

**"There is nothing like looking, if you want to find something. You certainly usually find something, if you look, but it is not always quite the something you were after." ― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit**

~oOo~

_"Welcome back to Channel 7 news, I'm Erica Daniels. We have an update on the fire that claimed the life of Lena King and spread to other houses. The police have now uncovered evidence that show that Lena King had died due to smoke inhalation. The coroner has reported King was unconscious, in the living room, while the fire spread. The police suspect King's step-father who neighbors have reported they have seen the man yelling at King and have also have heard shouts coming from the house. No reports have been filed. Kings step-father is now wanted for questioning. Please call the local police department if you have any information. He is considered dangerous. "_

~oOo~

Lena felt like Bilbo, the odd man out when Gandalf said that Lena would be coming with them as a second healer. Oin thought it was a great idea in case more than one of them got hurt but Thorin's face was like stone but something happened; something she never expected to happen...

He agreed.

Lena, however, was to learn to protect herself and stay close to Oin at all times. She smiled and nodded her head, taking note of the small pink color in his cheeks. Then Bilbo fainted reading the contract but Bofur really didn't help much either. Gandalf asked for help in moving the hobbit and as they did, Gandalf told Lena to keep her past hidden as much as possible to avoid conflict along with any mention of the book.

Lena nodded her head and mouthed slowly that she needed air. Gandalf let her go but she came across Thorin and Balin talking near the doorway. When they noticed her she blushed and pointed to the door, mouthing sorry to them as she passed. She gave them each a small smile before opening the door to the outside. Once the door closed behind her, Lena breathed in the cool air, her body letting go of the tension that she felt inside from being surrounded by some many people. She tried her hardest not to flinch at the contact when they touched her shoulder in a friendly way. Everyday will be a challenge for Lena but she has to be strong.

"A lady shouldn't be outside by herself at night with no one to protect her." A deep voice said, causing Lena to jump; turning around with a frightening look on her face. This made Thorin feel bad. "Forgive me my lady, I didn't mean to frighten you." Lena looked at him then down at her feet.

"Not...your...fault..." Lena croaked out but started coughing violently that Thorin had to help her sit on the bench.

"Please, if it hurts too much to speak do not." Thorin said keeling in front of her. "I actually came to speak to you, not to frighten. I wanted to make sure you want to come on this journey. There will be no second chances to go back." He said, his words soft and yet his heart was hammering so loud that he was afraid she might hear. Lena looked at Thorin, smiled sweetly before resting her hand on his larger one. She nodded her head, mouthing 'I'm fine.' Thorin sighed then moved to sit next to her, enjoying the silence for a time before they went back inside. Lena sat on the windowsill as the dwarves sang, their voices deep and powerful as they sang about their lost home. A tears ran down Lena's face but she bushed them away. The dwarf king took notice though, for he watched out of the corner of his eye her reaction to the song of his people. Before long Lena had fallen fast sleep with her head resting on the glass.

"If I didn't know you Thorin, I'd say you fancy the lass." Balin said with a smirk on his face as the dwarf king picked up the young woman in his arms. Balin had noticed through the night how his king watched her move and how he went after her when she passed them by after they were done talking.

"I do not fancy her Balin but here is something there, something I can't place but I feel it on my chest whenever I looked at her. I cannot explain it." Thorin lied, well, half lied. He carried the woman to the spare bedroom the hobbit said she could use and placed her on the bed. He pulled the blankets over her and froze when she muttered in her sleep, her face leaning towards the warmth of his hand. Thorin smiled ever so lightly before he left her, closing the door shut behind him.

~oOo~

The following morning Lena woke up for the first time, not afraid of opening the door. The room was small and warm; nothing like her old room where it was bare and lifeless. She knew it was safe here. Although she didn't get much sleep it was mostly due to her waking up; fearing that yesterday was nothing but a dream. Lena got out of bed; washed her face, arms, and neck then getting dressed for the day. She carefully adjusted the scarf around her neck before walking out of the room. Most of the dwarves were awake and packing their things away as she walked into the kitchen. They said good morning to her and she nodded her head in response with a smile. She wrote a note to Bombor who was cooking, if there was anything she could help with. He smiled and said the eggs needed some work while he focused on the meat they were going to have. While they worked, Bombor asked when was the last time when she slept really well for she looked tired. Lena froze for a second but continued to to cook, shaking her head.

Bombor took notice.

During dinner last night he saw her look at the food like it was the strangest thing to see. She was hesitant, afraid to touch it; almost like she was waiting for someone to tell her she could. Bombor didn't want that idea in his head. Lena was to nice and kind for some monster to treat her like that. Dwarven women, all women, are like precious treasures and should be treated like such.

Lena wrote that it was a long trip from her home but it was worth it.

She got to meet them all and it said she wouldn't regret the decision one bit.

Once breakfast was served and eaten with quiet chatter everyone got their bags together to load up onto the ponies.

"Are you all right Lena?" Kili asked the woman who was staring at the ponies. "Have you ever ridden a pony?" Lena shook her head.

"How did you get here?" Fili asked.

" _I died then brought back to life by one of the gods who then transported me just a mile from this home, that's how!_ " Lena thought in her mind but she moved her fingers along her palm to sign that she walked here.

"You walked?! How far away is your home?" Kili asked and Lena mouthed 'very far'.

"Uncle! Who will Lena be riding with since we do not have any extra ponies and she cannot herself?" Fili called to his uncle who was strapping down his bags. Lena's cheeks burned in embarrassment that she couldn't ride one and left useless at the moment.

"She will ride with me for the time being until we get another pony for her. We must leave the free one open in-case Master Baggins decides to join us." Thorin said, looking at Lena. "If that is all right with you of course." Lena gave him a small smile before nodding her head.

Lena helped pack the rest of the bags onto the ponies and also keep them focused while they were strapped on by the others before it was time to leave. Lena kept her notebook and pen with her as Thorin came closer to her with his dark colored pony in hand. Lena was nervous but took a deep breath before Thorin helped her up. But her biggest challenge?

Thorin sitting so close behind her.

Lena looked over a Gandalf who gave her a reassuring smile as Thorin pulled himself up behind her. She flinched slightly but took deep breaths to calm her breathing, adjusting her scarf as best as possible in case he might see. Her hands wouldn't stop shaking and she had to keep telling herself that Thorin was a noble dwarf and would not hurt her. 

"Have no fear. I will not allow you to fall off." Thorin said in her ear and her whole body tensed up. It wasn't until they started to make bets about Bilbo did Lena start to relax.

"I bet you 5 gold coins Bilbo joins us in the next few minutes." Lena tapped on Thorin's large hand to make him read what she wrote.

"Oh really my lady? Are you making a bet?" Thorin almost cracked a smile as she nodded her head. "I accept that bet my lady. We will see if he shows." Just a few minutes later Thorin was handing Lena her five gold coins. She smiled and felt giddy inside at Thorins' face.

It was worth knowing the future if she could get under the dwarf kings' skin. Just a little bit.

"I told you." Lena wrote. A small smirk played on the dwarfs lips that Lena noticed. Bilbo complained about not having a handkerchief but when they made camp, Lena surprised him by pulling one out of his bag she had hidden away before they had left.

"You're full of surprises Lady Lena." Bofur said.

Lena smiled and helped Bombor cook dinner. They all talked quietly until it was time to sleep. Lena wanted to place her bedroll away from everyone but Fili and Kili would not hear it. They hadn't 'talked' much on the trip but now all their questions started to pour out. Most were yes and no questions so Lena could answer them better. Before long Lena's eyes got tired and heavy and soon she was fast asleep to the sound of the dwarves snoring.

~oOo~

Bree looked a lot better during the day than at night. It was brighter and more busy with non-drunks than when the taverns are packed with them. Gandalf and Bilbo tagged along with Lena so that she could finish her shopping. She even got a comfortable pair of lace up boots that were a lot better than the ones she fell into this world with.

While she was looking at the other shops she noticed a shop keeper selling hair clips and other hair jewelery. There were many shapes and sizes with different jewels of all colors. With no rubber bands to hold back her hair she would need something to hold it back when they start riding again.

"Find anything you like my lady?" Lena jumped and turned around to see the dwarf king standing behind her.

"You need to stop doing that." Lena shoved her pad in Thorin's face and Thorin chuckled.

"Apologies my lady. I will try to make my presence more known in the future." Thorin said and gave a smirk that Lena rolled her eyes at.

"I need something for my hair to hold it back. I don't want it flying all over and I felt bad when it kept getting in your face." Lena wrote. Thorin came closer to the stand to look over the wares. They were nothing like the craftsmanship of his people but they would suffice in the mean time until they reached his kingdom but a simple hair clip with emeralds did catch his eye. He picked it up, looked it over, then told Lena to turn around. Lena did and slightly flinched, which Thorin noticed, when he threaded his fingers through her hair so that her bangs were pulled back. He clipped the hair he gathered then began to finish the remaining piece of hair off with a braid that went down the back of her head. Thorin knew the braid was risky but he knew she was his one. He finished off the braid with one of the beads from the stand. He pictured a braid in her hair finished with one of his own beads but it would have to wait.

Lena turned around to face him; a light blush on her cheeks made her even more beautiful in Thorins eyes. Lena tried to protest when he paid the vendor but said that it was nothing and that a beautiful woman needed something pretty to have. Her blushed deepened. He offered his arm which she gladly took as they made their way towards the Prancing Pony.

Lena took a small nap in her room before dinner. She would be sharing a room with Bilbo and Gandalf seeing at that the inn was short on rooms so they would all have to share. Bilbo came to get her when it was time for dinner and when she arrived at the bottom floor she wanted to run back up the stairs. Of course she should have expected it but she was enjoying being happy for a change that she forgot the horrid smell of booze and sweat of men.

She sat next to Bilbo, across from Fili and Kili, and sat almost like stone. She was afraid, on edge and she tried to relax but she just couldn't. The laughing made her flinch and the smell got worse with each spill the men made. Lena barely touched her food when it came that Bilbo asked her what was wrong. Kili and Fili took notice as well but she simply wrote that the men made her uneasy. They got the pity looks on their faces that she hated before they said that no harm would come to her so long as she was with them. She smiled weakly and ate a few pieces of her dinner but she just couldn't.

"I'm going to go to bed early. Maybe some more sleep will help me. I'll eat before we leave tomorrow, I swear. Okay?" Lena wrote and the boys said they would hold her to it. She got up from her seat and made it only a few short steps before a greasy hand grabbed her and pulled her onto his lap.

"Look what I got here boys! I sweet nice wench to keep my bed warm!" The man and his friends laughed out loud as Lena struggled against him. He tried to kiss her, his hand roaming everywhere as she tried to speak but no words would come out. She thought about _him,_ how his hands wrapped around and squeezed the life out of her then left her to die. She hated his hands...

A strong pair did rip her away from the drunk and into a warm embrace of another. Swords and axes were drawn and she felt the tension in the air as she gripped her scarf around her neck tighter. There was shouting and different words were being spoken before strong rough hands cradled her face, bringing them up to face gray stormy ones.

"Did he hurt you?" Thorin asked and Lena shook her head. Dry sobs racked her body and she gripped the front of Thorin's shirt. Gandalf took her away after the man in charge came to make sure no fight broke out. He helped Lena upstairs and into bed, giving her something to help her sleep along with helping the bruise on her neck heal. As she felt herself slip she heard someone speak to Gandalf in a soft voice.

"Something happened Gandalf. Something happened to her to get a reaction like that."

"I understand your concern but if she wants to tell her tale then she will on her own time. You cannot rush these things Thorin, it will only cause her more pain."

"I wish to take it away, not to add to it. I would see her safe and out of harms reach but this quest will put her right in the middle of it."

"There will always be danger Thorin, no matter where she is. She is safer with this company than anywhere else. Have faith in her Thorin, she will pull through. She is tougher than you think."

"I hope so Gandalf. Seeing her hurt is more than I can bare."

"It seems that you are not as cold as everyone believes." Gandalf said with a sly smile.

"We treasure our woman wizard. As part of our company, she will be treated with respect." Thorin's voice was ruff. 

"Tomorrow is a new day Thorin. Let us see how she fairs come morning. Get some rest." With that, it was silent in the room and Lena welcomed the darkness of sleep.


	4. Morning After

**"So he tasted the deep pain that is reserved only for the strong, just as he had tasted for a little while the deep happiness." ― F. Scott Fitzgerald**

~oOo~

The following morning made Lena's head heavy with her last night scare. She passed out well beyond the time Bilbo and Gandalf went to bed and stayed in as long as she could but it was Gandalf who woke her. She washed her face, putting her hair up with the clip Thorin had brought her yesterday. She touched it was a softness and smiled at how gentle he was when he touched her hair. It made her heart flutter. After she was dressed she started to get her things together. Lena felt numb when Gandalf placed a hand on her shoulder, telling her that things had cooled off but the others were worried. She didn't want them to worry but yesterday...she tried so hard to forget at least for a little while but that stupid mad smelled just like him...and his hands...

"Are you alright Lena?" Lena turned around to see Bilbo standing behind her with a frown. She smiled faintly, nodding her head.

"I'm alright. That man just gave me scare that's all. My trip was very long." She wrote down on her pad then showing him.

"The others told me that they're very protective of their women so you're safe with them. No one is going to hurt you again." He gave Lena a reassuring smile to which she returned one.

"Thank you." Lena sighed. "Are they still eating breakfast? I didn't have much last night." Bilbo smiled and said yes, walking her downstairs. There was a lot less people than last night to which only the company plus a few others were sitting down eating. The company all stopped and turned to face her. She felt horrible and she tried not to make eye contact with anyone, especially Thorin. She ended up sitting in-between Oin and Fili who gave her smiles which she returned. Lena wrote down what she wanted from the barmaid who nodded after reading Lena's note.

When she looked up she caught Thorin's eye.

She tried to smile at him but his face was like stone, unfeeling and yet there was a storm behind his gray eyes. When he didn't smile back she bent her head to look at the table.

"You alright lass?" Lena looked to to Dwalin asking but she knew the others were thinking the same question.

Lena nodded her head, "I'm okay. Tired and hungry from last night. Thank you for asking." She stopped writing for a moment before continuing. "I'm sorry about last night. I didn't mean to freak out." Oin read the note out loud. The others growled and shook their heads.

"That _ollikh_ is nothing but scum of the humans. He had not right to touch you." Dwalin growled and Lena smiled.

"Thank you. He frightened me and I was a little shaken up I could hardly fight back." She tried to explain but they wouldn't hear nothing of it. They told her that until she could learn to fight back they would protect her and even when she learned they would still. Lena thought herself more of a burden than anything but she didn't write anything more. Her food came a short while later and there was little talking. Every once and a while she would look up to see Thorin looking at her but she quickly diverted her eyes away.

Once breakfast was taken care of, the company got their things together to head out. They saddled up the ponies and Lena noticed that there was the exact same number of ponies they had started out with. Didn't Thorin say she would be getting a pony of her own?

"We couldn't find a pony for sale or one for your size Lady Lena. We're stuck with riding one of us still." Bofur said and Lena just smiled, giving him a shrugged her shoulders like she didn't mind at all.

"Who do I ride with then?" She wrote down so Bofur could read out loud.

"You'll ride with me." Thorin's booming voice sounded over the lot of them. Heat rose to Lena's face and butterflies appeared in her stomach when he turned to look at her with the same storm gray eyes. Lena approached him slowly, unsure to what might he say but she could tell by the way his eyes softened that it wasn't going to be towards her. There was a way to tell how people were thinking just by looking at their eyes. Softer and kinder, the lighter they are. Passion is darker and yet you can still see what color. Anger...is all dark; there's not color and it seems so lifeless with so much fire.

"I'm sorry about last night. I didn't mean to freak out. He just startled me." Lena wrote, showing it to Thorin.

"Do not apologize. You did nothing wrong Lena." Thorin said tightly strapping on the saddle to the pony.

"I caused trouble." Lena wrote. When Thorin saw it he growled under his breath before snapping on Lena that it was the drunk who caused trouble, not her. Lena flinched at the tone of his voice. She started to back away from him slowly, bumping into Gandalf who appeared right behind her.

"Lady Lena, why don't you ride with me this time? It will give us a chance to catch up since our last talk. Come Lena." Gandalf guided Lena to his horse which was the tallest animal out of the bunch. She looked over her shoulder to see Thorin's sullen face that held anger and guilt for some reason.

Gandalf helped her up onto the back of a horse, sliding behind her to take the reins. The ride was silent, except for the minor talk from the back of the group but Lena felt confused and dizzy about the situation with Thorin. At first he isn't mad and then he snaps at her. Ugh...

"Do not fret over such things. Dwarven men are very protective of their women as you know. Give him time and he will understand. He will come around." Gandalf said.

"I'm trying Gandalf." Lena wrote on her pad.

"I know young one. As you know, situations like yours will take time. Things will get better." He said. Lena remained quiet for the rest of the ride until they broke for camp at twilight. Thankfully, the dwarves gave Lena her space instead of hovering over her. Fili and Kili tried to lighten the mood but it only helped a bit. She helped Bombor cook dinner and then went to the stream near the camp site to wash the dishes they had afterwards. She volunteered of course to do it but she didn't expect Thorin to help her. They sat in silence for a bit until Thorin cleared his throat before speaking.

"I...apologize. I didn't mean to snap at you." Thorin spoke after a while. "Nor was it my attention to scare you." Lena wrote on her pad then reached over and patted his shoulder.

"I understand. I wanted to think that my travels would not have effected me so but I'm afraid that was no the case in Bree. I should've been more careful." Lena wrote and Thorin's fits clenched.

"You must not keep blaming yourself, he grabbed you. We should've walked you to your room." He said and Lena flinched only slightly when she placed her hand on top of his own. Compared to his, Lena's hands were smaller and more pale. Even though Lena was a human, his hands were bigger and held scars from working at the forge.

"I should've walked around them or asked one of you to take me to my room but I was stubborn. Even?" Thorin's hand enclosed on her own. He spoke no words at that but he nodded his head like he didn't trust his voice at the moment. After they had returned from with the dishes and everyone began to settle down Thorin asked if he could sit with her before his shift for the night started. Lena nodded with a small smile. 

"Can you describe Erebor? What was it liked when you lived there?" Lena wrote down as they sat together, a little ways from the others to look up at the sky. They had already gone through two pages that night with her questions about himself and Lena answering his questions. "Where I'm from, you never see stars like this. So beautiful..." Thorin smiled faintly and then told her everything about his lost home. It felt oddly comforting to have Lena sit next to the dwarf king. He had said repeatedly that he was sorry about the way he acted around her and it felt like...there was this trust around the both of them Lena couldn't really explain.

She felt safe around him.

When he smiled and she saw, Lena couldn't help but grin as well. And then there was the slight touches of each others hands. Slight brushes but nothing much since they held hands by the river but they could feel the warmth radiating off both of them.

"Lena...if you don't mind me asking...I've notice you flinch whenever someone touches you." Lena froze. "Please Lena...I can't explain it but if anyone harmed you in anyway..." Thorin sighed and clenched his fists to control the anger burning inside him. The mire thought of anyone harming his One...

"I'm sorry...I can't..." Lena wrote but her handwriting wasn't its beautiful cursive writing but more like chicken scratch. Her hands began to shake.

"Just know Lena...you are not alone." He placed a hand over her shaking hand and it stilled. With that said Thorin stood and went to stand by the fire to talk among the others for a bit. Lena sighed, looking up at the stars above her head.

Must this world test her so?

Why couldn't everything from before just disappear like it never happened?

She wasn't lucky enough for that to happen.


	5. Yet I'm Still Here

" **Friendship is born at that moment when one man says to another: "What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . ."" ― C.S. Lewis**

~oOo~

"What is this?" Thorin asked, taking a small bit of whatever Lena was handing out to all the members of the company. They had stopped for a break after long hours of riding and Lena was going through her bag when she opened a part that made a large smile break out on her face. Thorin had never seen such a smile on her face when she turned to look at him; he couldn't help the heat coming onto his own. That smile made his heart race and he wanted her to smile like that only for him.

"Something from my home. I made it. I forgot I even had it in my bag. Must've been hiding." She wrote on her pad and gave him another smile. Ori was the first one to come over and see what she had. She all but practically shoved a small piece at him and urged him to eat it. Soon, everyone in the company at a piece and were telling the woman how good it tasted. Now, here she stood in front of him, waiting for him to eat it. How could he deny her?

One bite and that's all it took for the dwarf king to love her cooking.

"It's nothing much but I love to cook; especially sweets." She wrote and Thorin gave the woman a small smile before she was called by Bombor who wanted to ask her of any recipes they could make on the road. Of course, as they rode on again, Lena was writing away all the things she learned over the years. Her face was calm and set into concentration as they rode. Thorin couldn't help himself as he watched her write and when he was caught he looked away but Lena couldn't help but smile. "You stare a lot." She wrote on a new page.

"Forgive me, my lady, but you are still a rather strange creature in my eyes." Thorin said with a chuckle.

"A creature am I?" She wrote and Thorin started to laugh.

"A rather strange and peculiar creature to which I have no answers for. You have written very little of your world. I would like to hear more of where you come from." He said and the smile fell from her lips.

"My world is a dark place even though there is light. There's no magic there either. It doesn't matter how many stories you tell or how hard you believe; there's just no more magic in it." Lena wrote with a frown.

"Did you believe?" Thorin asked.

"I did…for a time. My mother used to tell me stories when I was a child. Stories of knights riding on horseback to save the princess or powerful wizards who vanquish evil. My father would often act out the stories in front of us. Whenever it got to a point where the prince would kiss his princess he would race over to us and kiss us both." Lena smiled as did Thorin.

"They sound like wonderful people. Where are they now?" Thorin asked as they stopped for the night. He helped her off the horse and she looked at him with a sad face. She scribbled something on her pad, ripping the page off before handing it to him. She walked away from him to help Bombor with dinner, handing the large dwarf what she had written earlier in the day. It must've been the recipes she was writing for him.

Thorin looked down at the filled page to see something scribbled at the bottom that's circled twice. 'They're gone.' It wrote and Thorin looked over at the woman. His heart knew the pain she was feeling and he wanted to take it away. He wanted her to take his own pain away as well so that they'd both be free from it.

A few hours after the sun had set and the fire was glowing in red orange flame did Bilbo ask about the stories her mother told her. Bilbo and Lena were talking for quite a while; answering her questions and she did the same. He too asked her about her family and she told him just as well. Bofur asked her about her stories and she said she would write one down so he could read out loud if they really wanted to. She said it was just a little girl's story but they said they wanted to listen anyways.

While Lena went away with writing her story, the others were asking her yes or no questions or just making jokes that would put a smile on her face. Thorin stood behind her for a time before he joined the others by sitting in the empty spot next to her. Once Lena was done she handed the sheets of paper over to Bofur who then cleared his throat and began to read.

"Once upon a perfect time, many hundreds of years ago, when the old magic clung to Moonacre Valley, there was a young woman whose skin gleamed as pale as the star and whose heart was as pure as a moonlight. Such was her bravery and goodness she was beloved by nature as if she was its own daughter. One fateful night, the moon blessed her with an extraordinary gift that would change the magic of the valley forever. The moon pearls. From that day forward she was known as the Moon Princess. Two ancient families lived in harmony at the edge of the valley sharing nature's bounty. Daughter to the De Noir clan the Moon Princess was deeply in love and was to be married to Sir Wolf Merryweather. Her father, Sir William De Noir, blessed the union by presenting the couple with a rare black lion. 'For my daughter's bridegroom!' said her father. 'Thank you, father!' the princess said with a large smile. In turn, Sir Wolf gave his bride a unicorn. Lured from the wild white horses of the sea. 'Only an animal of such beauty and purity could be the companion of the Moon Princess.' Her heart overflowing with happiness, the Moon Princess revealed the magical pearls to both families. 'Nurtured fathoms deep in the heart of the ocean, these pearls were given to us by Mother Nature herself, promising untold riches to us all. Look! They have a unique power! They can reveal the truth in man's heart!' Legend told of their unique powers, so strong the pearls will grant every wish. Both good and evil!"

Bofur read out loud and then turned to the next page.

"The moon princess truly believed in the goodness of all. But the men soon revealed the greed that was in their hearts. Each desperate to claim the power of the pearls for himself. 'We are the chosen ones. These pearls will stay with the De Noir clan forever.' Said the father of the bride once his fingers touched the pearls. 'Father, we…' the princess went to ask her father. 'Come, be with me.' Said the man she was to marry. 'Let Moonacre be your home and me your family.' The bride's father took her intended's hand and placed it on the pearls. 'Speak truth!' He ordered. 'With the power in these pearls, I could claim the whole valley for myself!' He dropped the pearls and looked at his bride with a worried face. 'No. Together. I mean, together, we could rule the valley.' He tried but failed. The princess placed the pearls back in the box with a slam. 'These pearls belong to no man! They belong to nature!' She said and moved around from them. 'Give them to me!' cried her father. 'No. Give them to me!' Her husband to be ordered and they took the box from her hands. The both of them fell to the ground, fighting over the pearls as the princess tried to get them to hear her voice. But she was not heard. Betrayed by those she loved most, the moon princess unleashed the power bestowed upon her and cast a terrifying curse over them all. 'Hear me!' Her voice cracked as lighting stuck around them. 'You have spurned the gifts of nature, and you shall suffer for it! Nature will wreak her revenge and put a curse upon this valley! One day a pure heart will walk among you, and if she is not heard, when the 5,00th moon rises from the sea, this valley shall be plunged into eternal darkness!' The moon pearls vanished that day, and where to find them remained a secret.'

Bofur took a moment to stop and breathe.

"What happened next?! Was the curse broken!?" Ori exclaimed and his brothers hushed him. Lena chuckled silently and handed the dwarf the next page.

"My mother never got to the end." Bofur said and stared at the page for a second. "What do you mean your mother never got the end?! There has to be an end!"

"Aye, there has to be one! All stories have an end lass!" Gloin said with a huff

Lena wrote more on her notebook and showed it to the dwarf. "My mother said that, that's how the story ended for her. Her mother never told her the ending either."

"What a wash." Nori said.

"Maybe you could make up the ending." Ori said timidly and everyone turned towards the woman. She scribbled something down and handed it to the dwarf king to read this time.

"I don't know where to begin. I've never finished a story before." He spoke and everyone started to throw ideas of how the end the story at Lena. She took them all into consideration before handing Thorin what she wrote. "I'd like to think they'd have a happy ending. Isn't that how all stories should end?"

"Aye, that how some would go but some stories don't end with happily ever after." Dwalin huffed and Balin gave his brother a weak slap on the arm.

"Don't discourage the lass brother. Let her end the story the way she wants to end it." Balin turned towards the girl. "End the story the way you want it to end Lena. It's your story now." Balin said with a soft smile and Lena returned it.

Maybe she could it end?

~oOo~

Sometime after, once all had settled and many had started too drifted off Lena was staring out over the valley below them. She had separated herself from the others for a little bit of peace to think about the ending she had to come up for her story. She always wondered why her mother never ended it or the story about the sun princess which was even sadder than the moon princess.

She was a very strange lady, her mother. She would do some of the weirdest things and even after her father died she was never the same again. Almost like she was really hiding herself away from her new husband but at the same time…something felt off about her.

An eerie sound echoed in the valley, causing Lena to take notice and stand from where she sat. She remembers this part in the movie of course but it also reminded Lena of the other _things_ that lurked around them in the shadows as well.

"What was that?" Bilbo asked from where he stood, secretly feeding his horse apples.

"Orcs." Kili said with a straight face. Lena noticed Thorin straighten up from where he sat. His eyes went to her and she gave the king a slight nod before moving over towards his nephews where it would be safer. On her way she gave the dwarf king a slight squeeze on his arm and his fingers caught her before he let go. A simple gesture of comfort. Lena like the dwarf king. He was very nice to her even though he had a tendency to snap at her.

"Orcs?!" Bilbo said, coming closer to the group.

"Throat-cutters. There'll be dozens of them out there." Fili said. "The lowlands are crawling with them."

"They strike in the wee small hours when everyone's asleep. Quick and quiet, no screams. Just lots of blood." Kili said and the hobbit's face paled. The brothers chuckled but stopped once Lena flicked Kili's ear to hush him. She have them both a stern look but it was their uncle's voice that made them silent.

"You think that's funny? You think a night raid by Orcs is a joke?"

"We didn't mean anything by it." Kili said with a somber face.

"No, you didn't. You know nothing of the world." Thorin said and stomped off to be alone. Lena knew better than that so she slipped towards him as Balin began the story of why Thorin hated Orcs so much.

"After the dragon took the Lonely Mountain, King Thror, tried to reclaim the ancient Dwarf kingdom of Moria. But our enemy had got there first. Moria had been taken by legions of Orcs, led by the most vile of all their face: Azog, the Defiler. The giant Gundabad Orc had sworn to wipe out the line of Durin. He began, by beheading the king."

Lena looked at Thorin to see a pained expression. Without thinking, she placed her hand on his arm. He looked at her and their eyes met. Warmth spread into his heart and Thorin placed his hand over hers, giving it a light squeeze before he let go.

"Thrain, Thorin's father, was driven mad by grief. He went missing. Taken prisoner or killed, we did not know. We were leaderless. Defeat and death were upon us. That is when I saw him. A young dwarf prince, facing down the pale orc. He stood alone, against this terrible foe. His armor rent, wielding nothing but an oaken branch as a shield. With one clean sweep, Thorin took off the Defiler's own hand. Azog the Defiler learned that day that the line of Durin would not be so easily broken. Our forces rallied and drove the Orcs back. And our enemy had been defeated. But there was no feast, nor song that night, for our dead were beyond the count of grief. We few had survived. And I thought to myself then, there is one who I could follow. There was one, I could call king."

With that Thorin turned to see the company on their feet for their king. He gave them a small nod of his head and began walking back towards them. Lena reminded where she stood, letting the king be with his men.

"And the pale Orc? What happened to him?" Bilbo asked.

"He slunk back into the hole whence he came. That filth died of his wounds long ago." Thorin said. After Gandalf met the eyes of Balin he turned them towards Lena. In his eyes was the question she hated to answer but she shook her head.

No, the pale orc is not dead. His anger kept him alive.

Lena turned around and looked over at the valley towards the other side where she knew those _things_ were watching and she hoped that they could see her. She wanted them to know what she could see them and that she knew they were there. With luck, knowing that they were known would give them some time but she doubt it.

Nothing stopped Azog.

That monster would not stop until he was no longer breathing.

~oOo~

"I hope my past did not frighten you." Thorin said to Lena asked they packed their camp up in the morning.

"My past isn't filled with rainbows either." She wrote real quickly before helping saddle their bags.

"I just hope you do not think less of me." He said and cursed the feeling of heat coming to his face.

"I'm still here am I not?" She spoke, actually spoke and it scared Thorin a little. Sure it was rough to his ears but she talked none the less. It made the heat to his face grow even more and he hid it away but Lena already saw.

"You said your parents are gone. May I ask how? I do not wish to bring up if it bring up too much pain." He said and helped her up. Lena was quiet for a moment before showing Thorin her notebook.

"My father died in a robbery gone wrong and my mother died in a cart accident." Thorin read. Lena lied about the cart but it was the closest thing to car she could get without giving herself away. Before Lena went to bed Gandalf reminded her to keep her past quiet especially about the book. She knows more about the future than anyone and just one change could screw the future up big time.

"I'm sorry." He said and Lena placed a hand on his.

"No need to be sorry. It happened a long time ago. I miss them but it…was meant to be I guess." She wrote.

"No parent should be taken from their child." He said.

"I know but please, let us talk of other things. You said you had siblings. Tell me about them." Lena said and quickly changed the subject. She knew better than to dwell on the past. It only brought up more pain. Things of happier times in the past was fine but it is best to look towards the future.

The future is unknown, unwritten.

Anything can happen.


	6. A Sickness In Her Veins

**“Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.” ― William Shakespeare**

~oOo~

Lena thought that this day had to be the worst so far on the journey.

Lena felt sick as they entered a strange forest. It didn't help that it was raining. The forest looked like nothing but one out of a horror film as Lena sunk as close as she could to Thorin. Sure, she was still an inch taller than him but with her slouching she rested comfortably under his chin. His large arms wrapped around her tightly as they rode through the wood. She felt warm and safe, not even flinching when he would rub his thumb over her hand or when he would tighten his arms around her.

Things got worse when they had a river to cross.

"Can you swim lady Lena?" Fili asked as she stood with Bilbo, looking over the wide river. Lena nodded her head. They were drench as they stood, looking over the river. Lena had taken swimming lessons as a child and found herself swimming at the college pool whenever she didn't feel like going home to the monster. She is actually a decent swimmer.

"Why are we stopping?" Bilbo asked.

"We have to lead the ponies across the river. They'll panic if we ride across. Uncle is coming up with a plan to get across." Kili came up behind them with his usual grin on his face. "What are you smiling about brother?"

"Lena and Bilbo are to ride between us. We are to make sure they don't fall in." Kili smirked and Lena pouted, causing the brothers to chuckle. She rolled her eyes and looked over at the others who were readying the ponies. Thorin stopped what he was doing to look over at her and they both looked away out of embarrassment. Lena felt heat rise to her face and had to face the brothers teasing her about the looks they had seen. Lena shook her head and start to tug at the sleeves of her shirt, mostly out of nerves.

"Don't worry Lena, nothing will happen." Bilbo said and gave Lena a reassuring smile while placing a hand on her shoulder. Lena flinched away and walked over to where Fili and Kili had started to ready their pony.

Bilbo noticed something was wrong but it wasn't his place to say. Everyone knew of course but they knew that human women were different than theirs but still…they had begun to care for the woman. Although she did not speak she had begun to take root in the hearts of the dwarves with little steps. Bombor with her cooking, Bifur with their mutual silence and smiles, Bofur with her story telling, Fili and Kili were just given, Oin with her medical knowledge, Ori with her sweetness, Balin and Dori with her questions about almost anything, Dwalin when she asked for ways to defend herself whenever she wouldn't shy away, and Gloin when asking about his family. Nori was still a little stiff but every now and then he would smile whenever she wrote something down that was funny. What Bilbo liked about Lena was that they had a mutual understand about the situation they were in. He would ask her questions and she would answer with a smile. That smile was real, he knew, unlike the others he had seen her give the others.

Sometimes he would just watch her stare into space like she was waiting for something…

Or someone…

What did this girl do to deserve the fate given to her?

"Master Baggins, we are on the move!" Thorin called to Bilbo who snapped out of his thoughts. They lined up one by one, Gandalf going first followed by Thorin then Balin. Thorin hated the idea of Lena being last in the line but she would be safe with Fili and Kili.

One by one they crossed the river until it was Fili's turn to cross, followed by Bilbo then Lena with Kili behind them. Bilbo was already nervous as they waded across the river and it didn't help Lena who was trying her hardest to stay upright as well. The current of the river was strong, the water going halfway up their waists. Just when Bilbo was about to reach the bank, Fili already to safety, did the hobbit slip. He tried to stay upright but his pony panicked; bucking wildly so that Bilbo would release the reins on it.

"Bilbo!" Kili shouted as the hobbit went under the water.

Fear rose into Lena's throat as she too let go of the reins of her pony.

Without even thinking, the last courageous bone in her body from before, appeared as she dove into the water after the hobbit. The water roared in her ears as she used the current to get closer to the hobbit. When he was within reach she took hold of his coat, dragging him closer so that when she saw a large rock in sight they would be able to take hold of it.

"Ah!" Lena yelped in pain as a sharp part of the rock dug into her hand. They clung to the rock till a rope appeared. Together they grabbed the rope, holding on tight as they were dragged to shore. The two coughed up the water that managed to get into their lungs as the company surrounded them. Thorin was yelling at Bilbo as Oin checked them over but it was all numb in Lena's ears. The world was spinning like a toy top a child wouldn't stop playing with. Words were speaking backwards and she could taste ash in her mouth.

" _What's going on? What's happening to me? I feel…sick…_ " Lena thought as she fell the ground, her eyes looking up towards the sky as she began to float away…

~oOo~

" _ **RUN! RUN!**_ _" Lena woke to shouts and screams. Opening her eyes, the sky was red as blood with ash falling from the sky. In horror, she looked around her._

_Bodies…_

_Bloody broken bodies were everywhere…_

_Lena climbed and stumbled over the bodies as she went towards the shouting. People were fleeing, running away from a large dark army off in the distance. People pushed past her, almost knocking her over as she tried to get someone attention to see where the hell she was. If her head would stop spinning and her eyes would stop leaking; then she could think clearly._

" _ **Your majesty, you must leave!**_ _" Lena turned her head to see a woman, dressed in flowing gold dress with her hair as white as now. Suns were printed faintly on her dress as she looked towards the approaching army._

" _ **We must make a stand here. Where is my daughter?!**_ _" The woman turned towards the fleeing crowd to find the person she was looking for but alas, she couldn't. "_ _ **Coward.**_ _" The woman said and faced the army. "_ _ **Stand and fight! Let the cowards run. For those who stay, it's till the death.**_ _" The woman ripped off her necklace, smashing it to the ground. Smoke rose from the necklace; the woman somehow absorbing it so that her clothes much less her whole body began to glow._

" _ **I can't…I can't do this…**_ _" Lena turned around to see a similar woman dressed in an extravagant dress but her hair was a mess. Her eyes were glossy as she struggled to get free from a man holding her arm._

" _ **You are a princess to this kingdom. You will do as you are told!**_ _" She ripped her arm free, picking up her dress before looking the man in the eye._

" _ **And as princess I am to serve my people, not sacrifice them for our own personal gain. This necklace is to serve man not to rule over him. I refuse that role.**_ _" With that the woman took off, fleeing as the man cursed the woman. Lena followed the fleeing woman as she blended into the crowd._

_The world began to spin, bodies blur, as Lena pushed past people to reach the woman fleeing. Something in her heart made her want to go after this woman, to ask her questions._

" _Wait…. wait!"_

~oOo~

"What's wrong with her?" Thorin demanded as Gandalf and Oin looked Lena over. When she collapsed, Gandalf was the first one to look her over before wrapping his cloak tightly around her. Oin came in second to touch her forehead.

"She's burning up Thorin." Oin said with a solemn voice. "She must've been feeling sick earlier but didn't tell anyone. A fever like this would like hours to appear."

"There is a farm, not far from here where we can take shelter for a while." Gandalf said then asked Kili and Fili to get the ponies. "We have to hurry."

"Our quest." Thorin said regretfully.

"The farm is on our way Thorin. If we do not get her to a dry warm place soon this fever will kill her." Gandalf said and picked the woman up.

They rode hard to the farm house Gandalf said was in the area. It took them until dusk to get there but they did. Lena's breathing was raspy and her fever hadn't lessened as Gandalf took the woman in his arms once more. He got half way before the woman struggled to get free. He dropped her and rubbed her back as she emptied her stomach. With help from Oin they walked her to the door. With loud bangs upon it an elderly woman answered. Gray hair and wrinkles; dressed in dark robes. The woman looked older than she was.

One look at the sick woman had the elderly woman moving out of the way, directing them to the spare bedroom the woman had for guests. Gandalf placed the woman down on the bed before the old woman told the men to get out.

"Make something to eat on my fire, I will be a while. Tell them to change their clothes as well. They'll drip all over my floor." The woman said before shutting the door.

"Well?" Thorin asked the wizard as they entered the living space.

"She is with Lena now. I am told to tell you to make something to eat and to change your clothes as well. It will be a while." Gandalf said and sat down on the nearest chair. The company looked beaten as Bombor started to make an dinner. They changed their clothes and hung them over any furniture that wasn't covered in herbs or dust. After a while the woman came back out again; everyone getting to their feet in respect.

"How is she?" Balin asked, breaking the silence.

"She is not from here, is she?" The woman asked.

"No, she is not." Gandalf answered.

"Who was sick last? Is could be from a few weeks to months old."

"Ori was sick last." Nori said and looked over at his little brother. "What does that have to do with Lena?"

"When anyone from another land comes into another, and they are not exposed to the types of sickness that land has, they can become quick sick if around the right people. Since the woman is obviously not from here she was able to get such a sickness. Your brother has had this sickness before?" The woman asked.

"When he was little…"

"But the severity of this last sickness wasn't as bad, yes?"

"Well..yeah…"

"That is because the body knows that sickness and fought it off faster." The woman answered.

"How do you know this?" Oin asked, his horn next to his ear.

"Madam Gillroy studies sickness." Gandalf spoke up. "I knew you were in the area so I knew you wouldn't turn away the sick." The woman gave Gandalf a look before turning back to the company.

"When you lads are done eating and are dry, the barn is where you will stay. There is a lot more room for the lot of you than my living room. The woman will stay with me."

"How long till she gets better?" Thorin asked.

"If her fever breaks then you can leave tomorrow afternoon. If not…I suggest you leave without her." The woman turned and walked out of the room but Thorin stopped her.

"Can we see her?"

"Not for long or you risk getting sick yourselves. Make sure that you wash everything with boiling hot water. Whatever she touched needs to be cleaned. I will also need to see her things and make sure she does not carry this with her should she be able to leave." Thorin followed the woman to the room Lena stayed in. She left him alone, leaving the door open a crack.

Lena's breathing hadn't improved and her face was flushed. She shivered under the covers and didn't look any better than before. Thorin took a seat next to her, reaching under the covers for her hand. It was cold and clammy and it scared Thorin. This woman had almost his entire company wrapped around her finger and here she is, dying.

"You have to get better. I may not be your king but I order you to get better." He said and leaned down to plant a kiss on her forehead. "Please, _amrul_ , you must get better. For me."

~oOo~

"Gandalf…" Madam Gillroy got Gandalf's attention, gesturing him to follow her. Once they were out of earshot of the company did the woman began her questions. "That woman. Do you know of her injuries? The bruises on her neck? The scars on her body?"

"Yes, I know. Her past life…was not any easy one."

"That is abuse Gandalf. I have seen those wounds on women before from their husbands. How is traveling with a company of over protective dwarves going to help her? Surely that must have noticed her actions. Flinching? Withdrawn nature? Lack of sleep? Do they even know?" The woman asked the wizard.

"I suspect some do but that have kept it to themselves. I do not know if they know the whole truth." He said.

"If I've heard anything true about the dwarves, they are not going to take that news well." The woman said, turning her head to the dwarves as they packed up their things to move into the barn.

"No, no they are not."

~oOo~

"It's my fault isn't?" Ori asked as the dwarves entered the barn. Even for a barn it was warm and comforting.

"No Ori, you couldn't have known she would have gotten sick." His brother Dori said, wrapping an arm around him.

"She's a tough lass. She'll pull through." Dwalin said as he set us his bedroll on some hay.

"Dwalin's right lads. Lena's not dead yet, have some faith." Bofur said to the others. Faith and a prayer is what they need at this moment. They can only hope that Lena makes it through the night.

"She'll make it. Get some sleep. This may be the only comfort we'll have for a long while." Thorin said and sat down. Sleep with comes little to him tonight as he prayed to his god for Lena.


	7. Hold My Hand

" **It's in our nature to want to forget truths that keep us awake at night." – Fallout: New Vegas**

~oOo~

Lena woke to the annoying chirping of birds outside of the room she was in. At first, she thought she was back _there_ but the rushing headache and memories from before, returned her to the world she ended up in. Lena couldn't remember the last time she was sick so badly. Sitting up slowly, Lena tried to remember what happened last night. The woman, being made to drink something horrible…Thorin…

Thorin came to see her…

She could hear his voice in the fog and this warmth on her forehead but she couldn't recall anything. Maybe nothing happened at all and it was the fever talking? Lena shook her head, regretting it for it made her even more dizzy, before she slowly started to get out of bed. Just as she got to her feet the door opened and the old woman from before stepped in.

"Oh good, you're awake and up. A good sign." The woman said, placing a bowl of water on the night stand. She came closer to Lena, placing a hand on her forehead then touching the side of her neck with two fingers before grinning. "Fever is gone and your heartbeat is steady. Good, good." The woman made Lena sit, drenching a rag in the warm water before rubbing it all over Lena's face, arms, hands, and neck.

"What…happened?" Lena's voice was even more sore and raspy than ever before. The woman tapped two fingers on Lena's forehead before returning to work on looking over Lena.

"Now, now enough talking. Your voice won't come back if you keep that up." The woman's eyes glanced down at Lena's neck to which Lena realized that that she wasn't wearing her scarf. Lena's hand flew to her neck to try and hide the healing bruise but the woman softly pulled away her hand. "No need to hide dearie. I've already saw the damage." The woman took out a small wooden container that held a mint smelling salve. "Rub this on your neck at night and it will hurry the healing process but I fear the damage to your voice will be permanent. It won't hurt but it will not be as clear as before." The woman pulled up the stool that sat next to the bed so that she faced Lena.

"The…others…" Lena ignored the woman's warning and tried to speak anyways. The woman sighed and began to rub the salve on Lena's neck.

"They are in the barn still asleep. You lot rode hard to get to me and they all needed a rest." The woman was quiet for a time before she looked at Lena with stern eyes. "Now dearie you must listen to me. Dwarves are very different from your world. You must keep this a secret a little bit longer for I fear if they found out at the wrong time it…won't be pleasant for both parties." The woman got up from her seat and went towards the door. "I'll go make some late breakfast and bring you some tea for your sickness. Your spare clothes have been washed and dried along with your scarf so please, when you are dressed and ready come into the kitchen. I'm sure your friends will be waking up very soon." With that the woman left Lena to get ready.

~oOo~

The night in the barn was the best sleep Bilbo has had since Bree.

The hay smelled fresh and new, the blankets she gave them were warm, and the storm they arrived in was long gone. Birds chirped outside and the ground was wet and soggy. They were packing up their things when Gandalf said that breakfast would be ready in a few minutes. Everyone asked about Lena but Gandalf wouldn't say.

They saddled up the ponies before going inside the house. The woman, Madam Gillroy, greeted them with a kind smile saying that breakfast would be ready soon. Bombor decided to be a good guest and give her a hand to which she was grateful. The dwarves were silent, sipping their tea quietly as the fire cracked in a glow of warmth.

"Mr. Baggins." Bilbo turned his head towards the woman. "Would you be ever so gracious to give this to Lena. I forgot to give it to her." The woman held out a thick blanket to him. "She'll have a small chill for a little while but this should help she stay warm." Bilbo took the blanket with a smile before heading down the hall to where Lena stayed. When he arrived, he knocked, calling to Lena who said that he could come in before entering.

What he saw, wrapped around her neck, explained everything.

"Lena…your neck." Her hands flew to her neck before dragging the hobbit further into the room, shutting the door behind him. She put her finger to her lips while he stood there in shock. The nasty black-purple bruise has turned a sickly yellow and green color with small pockets of blue still remaining. It stared Bilbo in the face until it was burned into his memory.

The hand print was as clear as it was when it first appeared on her neck.

"Don't…tell..." She rasped.

"Is this what you've been hiding?" She nodded her head. "Who did this to you? Is this why your voice is gone?" Lena looked defeated as she sat on the bed with her scarf in her hands. She was just about to put it on, not even thinking clearly when she let Bilbo in. Bilbo moved closer to Lena, draping the blanket over her shoulders before sitting next to her, taking one of her hands. "Forgive me…I did not mean…" Lena shook her head and looked at the hobbit.

"Meant…to…tell…explain…later." She rasped out and began a coughing fit. Bilbo stayed by her side for a bit before she tied her scarf around her neck once more before they made their way towards the others. When the two of them walked into the room, Lena was embraced by large smiles and quick hugs from everyone. They ushered her into a seat only to shove food at her. She ate slowly, looking at Bilbo to see if he would give anything away but he didn't. Only giving her a reassuring smile. One by one they asked how they felt but shortly afterwards Lena began a coughing fit once more, only this time, blood was on her hand.

"Oh dear." The woman moved swiftly to pour something before giving it to Lena. It was bitter and foul tasting but the woman made her drink all of it before giving her more broth to sip on. "Master Oin you are the party's healer, correct?"

"Indeed I am. Lena is our second healer." Oin said with his chest puffed out and a smirk on his face. The woman rolled her eyes before handing the dwarf a parchment envelope that contained dried herbs and leaves.

"Even better. She is to drink this when needed until she is well enough. I will also give you some tea leaves for her to drink at night to help her sleep better. She is to rest as much as possible. Understand?" The dwarf bowed low before walking over to Balin. He gave Lena a nod and a smile as he passed her. "And Gandalf?" The gray wizard turned towards the woman. "She is to ride with you so that the risk of anyone else catching it is lessened."

"But of course."

"Good." She turned towards the company. "When you are finished eating you may take your leave. I wish you all a safe and swift journey." She said and the men bowed. Lena smile at the woman and she too smiled softly back at her.

"Thank you Madam Gillroy." The gray haired woman turned to see the leader of the group standing behind her with his hands behind his back. "If it were not for you one of my company members would be dead."

"Tis something you should not fret over young Oakenshield." The king frowned as the woman smiled. "I have healed many over my long years and Lady Lena is another I can add to my saved list." Her eyes glanced over to where his lingered for far longer than he should. "Forgive me for saying this but I've noticed something."

"And?"

"You care for her, more than you should actually. You do know she is human correct?"

"And your point?"

"I have read many things about dwarves and the one thing they never talk about that is rarely written down is that of their soul mates, their One." The woman smirked but the smile quickly went away. "If she truly is your One then you must tell her soon or else she will not know why you have feelings for her."

Thorin crossed his arms and chose not to answer the woman who simply sighed before walking away. She was right in a way but at the same time, the dwarf king didn't know a thing about courting a female human. Their customs were much more different than hers, not to mention that human don't even have Ones that Mahal created for them. Human love is…something else.

Fleeting and forgetful.

~oOo~

"Take these Lena. So that your knowledge can be passed down even when those like me have been long since gone from this world. I know you will do great things." Madam Gillroy said as she handed Lena two black leather bound books. One was empty while the other was full of sketches of herbs and weeds for healing ailments.

" _Thank you._ " Lena mouthed from where she sat on Gandalf's horse. The woman smiled at her before Gandalf moved his horse away from the house. The rest followed, nodding to the woman in thanks as they passed her. Lena was wrapped up in her cloak and warm blanket to keep the chill away so that her recovery would hasten as they continued on their travels.

As they rode Lena read through the filled leather bound. It was filled with notes and sketches of everything the woman has come across along with directions on how to make salves, teas, and ointments. Oin would love to have a look at this when she was done with it. It would help immensely on their travel. Behind them the group chatted quietly among each other, talking about their rest and how they would be able to work with these provisions better than what they started out with since Madam Gillroy was kind enough to let them have dried meats, fruits, and veggies from her personal garden. Gandalf said that Madam Gillroy was kind beyond her years but also was very strict when it came to her patents. Their health came before anything else.

That night, as they made camp, Lena sluggishly set up her bedroll as close to the fire as possible but not to close that Bombor wouldn't spill something on her while he made dinner. Oin came to sit next to Lena, making sure she drank her medicine along with looking over the leather bound book Madam Gillroy gave her. Of course he was impressed, taking the empty one with Lena's permission to start making his own notes along with her own based on her medical book. Oin might have possibly read that medical book front to back at least three times during their travel. What he found inside was either curious or just plain strange but the method was something worth trying.

"Are you alright Lady Lena?" Bofur asked when he saw Lena swaying just a bit. Lena had her pad in her lap but the pounding headache made her penmanship sloppy.

" _A little bit dizzy. I'm going to bed early._ " She wrote, handing the notebook to the dwarf before laying down. Oin sat next to her, feeling her forehead and checking everything else but found that Lena was just tired.

"Get some sleep Lena. We will wake you when dawn breaks." Oin told the woman, patting her shoulder.

Sleep came quick to the woman as she curled tightly under her heavy blanket.

Though her dreams would not be as peaceful…

~oOo~

_Lena was dreaming again…_

_Only, this time, she was underground. The stones around her were smooth with strange designs and pictures lining the walls. Everything around her looked ancient, old and yet everything was clean and taken care of. Lena walked further down the hallway she appeared in, slowly moving as though she were walking through a strong current of water. Ahead of her she could hear chanting. A woman's voice was strained and in a rush as the strange words rolled off her tongue easy._

_Lena came to a large room with an altar, a large mirror, and burning torches. A woman was kneeling, bowing before the large mirror, her chanting getting louder and louder as Lena slowly walked up the steps to get a better look at the woman._

" _ **That is enough!**_ _" Lena turned around to see the woman from her last dream. Her armor was bloody and scuffed up as she held her bleeding arm close to her side. The chanting woman didn't even bother to stop, never acknowledging the armored woman behind her. "_ _ **I order you to stop at once! You are my daughter; you are to obey!**_ _" The armor woman limped up the steps slowly. Lena could feel the tension on the air; so thick that it could felt like it could collapse the whole room together._

_The armored woman drew her sword when she got close to the chanting woman but something stopped her._

_The mirror shattered._

_The armored woman shouted in pain as she was thrown back down the steps. These strange swirls of light came out of the destroyed mirror, enveloping the woman in a kind embrace so that she floated above the ground._

" _ **I am a coward mother, that is true, but I will not use what our legacy made to prove to the world that we are selfish and greedy. I would rather run and be a coward then die a monster.**_ _" The woman floating in the air said, not even turning her back towards her mother. Lena couldn't see her face but the voice sounded familiar._

" _ **You are no daughter of mine! Run then! I curse you and all your children! May you never find peace after death!**_ _" The armored woman shouted just as men in armor as well appeared behind her._

" _ **I accept that but you**_ _ **mother will die a monster. For I know, someday, that is terrible fate will be broken and that we…will fade into history.**_ _" The swirls of light drew the woman into the mirror before vanishing all together. The armored woman, however, was not so lucky. The men were quickly upon her, fighting her until two of them ran swords right through her chest. Lena quickly turned away from the sight, trying to block out the screams of the slain woman._

" _ **I will not die a monster…**_ _" It became hard for Lena to breathe and the room began to spin. Lena feel to her knees as the men set fire to the place._

" _ **Burn everything…make sure no one remembers this family and the horror they have done…**_ _" Smoke and flames were everywhere as Lena looked up one last time but quickly regretted it._

He _is here…_

_No…he can't be…_

_She escaped him…_

_Hands were on her, grasping her neck tightly, squeezing strongly. He straddled her body, pressing down so that it was harder for her to escape. His laughter filled her ears as her hands tried to pull his away; legs kicking with what energy she had left but was useless._

" _ **You're mine Lena…you were supposed to die…now I'll finish what I started…**_ _" He whispered in her ear and she could smell his foul breath on her neck, breathing harshly on her._

" _ **No…no…**_ _" Star flooded her eyes and soon things went black…_

~oOo~

"No!" Lena shot up from where she slept, breathing heavy as she tried to settle her beating heart. Everyone around her was still asleep, snoring peacefully in their own dreams. She tried to softly cough so that she wouldn't wake anyone but the length of it forced her to untangle herself from her blanket so that wouldn't wake anyone. Just a little ways away Lena allowed herself to work out her coughing fit but soon turned into throwing the contents of her stomach out. Tears rolled down her face as she lightly touched her neck, the memories of that night forever ingrained into her mind.

"Lena?" Lena turned head around to see Thorin standing behind her with a worried expression her face. "Are you alright?" Lena nodded her head and tried to act casual but staggered when she tried to walk back to camp. Strong hands, calloused and rough, grasped her arms to keep her from falling to the ground. Together with his help he helped her back to camp. Instead of placing her back on her bedroll he placed her on his. He quickly went to fetch her blanket, wrapping it around her tightly before sitting beside her. Lena shivered slightly as she stared into the fire. "You woke with such a start and fled the camp that I was worried." Lena looked at him with a raised brow. "Do not give me that look, my lady, I do indeed care for the well-being of this company." Lena smile was faint before she moved her hand like she was writing something. Thorin understood and quickly went to retrieve her notebook.

" _You have a funny way of showing your concern._ " She wrote.

"Forgive me, I am not as expressive as some of my men." Lena could faintly see a smile appear on his face.

" _Omg you can smile!_ " She wrote and Thorin tilted his head at her words.

"Omg?" Lena giggled silently.

" _It means 'oh my god' but we shorten it to omg but we say it like O.M.G._ " She smiled and Thorin found it addictive. " _You do look really nice when you smile._ " She wrote but when she realized she did, she tried to scribble it out but Thorin snatched the book away from her. His eyes scanned the paper before turning back towards her. Lena's face was bright red as she snatched the book away, scribbling the words out before covering her face with the blanket.

Thorin's chuckle was deep as he leaned in close to Lena. "And your smile is the brightest of us all." He said and watched as Lena peaked out from the blanket to look at him. A light dusting of pink painted his cheeks and it made a strange feeling appear in Lena's stomach. The two of them looked away before returning their eyes back towards each other. They sat together in silence, watching the slow burning flame of the fire.

Lena wanted to ask Thorin about what had happened when she was out of it but she didn't have the courage to write it down. Thorin seemed content on sitting next to her and she found that her flinching stopped whenever he was near. All thought about her dream disappeared and she felt so safe while she sat next to him.

Then she remembers the warmth her hand felt during the night…

Taking a risk, Lena slowly crept her hand under her blanket to find Thorin's. He didn't jump or seemed surprised when her hand found his but he switched positions so that his hand was holding hers. A soft smile came across her lips as she closed her eyes, feeling the pull of sleep once more. Just as she began to drift off she felt her head softly land on something soft and her hand suddenly became cold. Something tugged her closer to warmth so she snuggled closer to it, breathing deeply in the smell of pipe tobacco, leather, and something else she couldn't put her finger on.

"Sweet dreams _amrul._ " A deep voice said as she floated once more to sleep.


	8. Forgive Me

" **Our home is where we are. Our place of origin is not relevant, only where we choose to go together." – Legion (Mass Effect)**

~oOo~

Lena knew as soon as they came to a stop at a burn down house and rocky clearing that things were about to go from calm to chaotic when the sun set. It didn't really help that Bilbo wouldn't stop looking at her or staying close to her whenever Fili and Kili decide to tease Lena about getting sick. Lena had written him a letter, explaining everything but that only made the hobbit even more concerned.

And Thorin saw it too.

Whenever he saw the hobbit with Lena his fists would clench at his attentiveness. His nephews were one thing but that hobbit shouldn't…no…he couldn't be interested in his Lena. Could he?

"Lena, why won't you tell them what happened?" Bilbo asked Lena as they unpacked their bags from the ponies. Gandalf and Thorin were talking in the burnt house, very likely to get out of hand at the mention of getting the elves to help them since they were so close to Rivendell.

" _They would get angry at me. They won't trust me again. I can't have that._ " Lena wrote, dropping her pack on the ground. Since she was getting better she started to move away from the fire and back to sleeping in-between Fili, Kili, and Bilbo. Lena felt something of a protective bubble when she lay between them and when she couldn't sleep, she would always wake up when Thorin would be on watch. The two of them would sit together, their hands intertwining until the early hours of the morning. One time when it was Dwalin's turn to take watch, he found the two dozing off next to each other; Lena's head resting on his shoulder while his own rested on top of hers. By now only Bilbo, Dwalin, and Balin could correctly guess that their King was in love with Lena.

Everyone else thought about it but kept it to themselves for the time being.

"They would understand Lena. Please." Bilbo tried to get the woman to agree but he understood her pain; somewhat. Bottling something like this up won't help her if the others don't understand why she flinches when they touch her shoulder or why her nightmares are so painful. Sure, they might have some idea of what may have happened to her but they're kind enough that they would wait for her to open up about what's bothering her.

Unlike their king who wants to know everything about the woman.

" _I will. When I have enough courage to do so._ " Lena wrote down on her notebook before the two turned towards the direction of the fight between Thorin and Gandalf.

"Everything alright? Gandalf, where are you going?" Bilbo asked the gray wizard.

"To seek the company of the only one around here who's got any sense." The wizard replied as he stormed away from the group.

"And who's that?"

"Myself, Mr. Baggins." And with that the wizard disappeared into the woods.

"Come on Bombur, we're hungry." Thorin said and everyone went back to setting up the camp. Lena and Bilbo finished getting the bags off the ponies when she approached the king who paced in the ruins of the house. He seemed agitated and Lena wanted to calm him down but she just clung to her notebook tighter as she watched him. Her head began to get light and airy….

"What do you want?" Thorin sneered at her and Lena jumped. Her grip on her notebook tightened as she simply stared at him with wide eyes. "Well?"

Lena wrote in her notebook with her hands shaking the words, 'Are you ok?' but that seemed to only anger the dwarf more.

"Do I look like I am fine?" He growled at her and his tone became more frightening.

" _I'm sorry but Gandalf is right. We do need the elves._ " Lena wrote down but when Thorin saw the words his blood boiled.

"How dare you say that we need the elves! They are the ones who left us to die after Smaug! You know nothing of our plight!" Thorin snapped on her, his hand flying out only to knock away her notebook from her hands. Lena went to the ground with a surprised sound. Her arms bracing for impact of a blow that would not come and the pain she knew would come after it.

Thorin froze at the woman cowering before him, arms raised to protect herself like she had done it before. After a fleeting second Lena looked up with fearful eyes at him and he wished to take her pain away only she fled from his sight. She ran past the others who looked on in question and deep into the woods. Fili and Kili called out to her but she was gone too quick for them to stop her.

"Thorin…what did you do to the lass?" Balin turned to him but Thorin stood there with his mouth agape and hand stilling in the air.

"I snapped at her…I…did not mean to frighten her…I must go after her." Thorin made to leave but the old dwarf stopped him.

"We sent the lads after her. Give her some time to calm down." Balin said and Thorin stared at the path she ran from him. His chest ached and his hand touched the spot where it did. He cursed himself for snapping at Lena when she was only trying to help but how could she write that when they hated the elves so much. Why would she agree with the wizard anyways? Thorin growled and kicked a stone away from him before he retreated back into his mind to think.

Balin looked at his king then to where Lena had run off. He had hoped that the lads would find her. The woods are no place for a woman when the sun sets. The others looked at him and Balin simply shook his head. These two, especially Thorin, needed to calm down after Gandalf's outburst. They will have a talk about where to go once Lena is back in camp.

If she came back to the camp.

~oOo~

Lena didn't know what came over her but something in her panicked.

It snapped like a rubber band and she fled from Thorin like hell was at her heels. She tried so hard not to have a panic attack but she felt one stirring deep in her bones. She knew of these attacks well, many from reading and experiencing them first hand. Whenever her step-father would go out to work and then come home late Lena would sit in her closet waiting for him to return. Her heart would race and pound as she sat rocking back and forth whenever one of these attacks arose. Her silent screams echo the tiny room when she heard the door slam downstairs. His voice calling for her to appear.

Some nights she would try to remain quiet so he would simply pass out but other days she would appear for him, making him his dinner and beer before locking herself away in her room once again.

Branches of leaves and twigs caught on Lena's hair as she ran away. More from her actions than Thorin's. His angry voice and actions only reminded Lena of what once was but this broken body of hers acted on it. In a flash she was brought back to that moment and it scared her. She saw her house, the man standing over her with a wicked sick grin, and his bloody hand dripping onto the carpet. Lena ran and ran until a gray cloth covered arm reached out to steady her as she fell to the ground, her legs finally giving way.

"Easy, easy Lena you are all right. Breathe, breathe now." Lena tried to control her breathing as the wizard tried to help her down. Gandalf knew something like this was bound to happen but he was unsure about when it would. "There, there, that's it. Calm your breathing and slow your heart. Everything is all right. You are safe now." Minute by minute Lena calmed down and soon she sat breathing heavy in the arms of the gray wizard. Lena's head felt heavy and light all at once and she wiped away her tears. Gandalf left her alone while he made a small fire to keep the woman warm.

"Trolls…" Lena croaked and the wizard turned towards her.

"Yes…I sensed them near. I fear the others will no doubt find a way to them. You know if this as well yes?" Lena nodded her head. "Then tell me even though I said not to about what happens next." And she did.

Lena spoke slowly and surely about the coming moments about the trolls and the warg attack and of how they come to Rivendell. Gandalf had a smile on his face when he muttered that they enemy just might be helping them after all. Lena gave him a look he chuckled at and told her that the others would need her shortly. Lena took a deep breath and stood, coughing at the dryness of her throat but she followed Gandalf closely.

Together they found the dwarves, caught just like she had spoken of; just like the book has said that he burned months ago. Three trolls surround the fire with some dwarves on the spit while some are bound in burlap sacks. Gandalf stood behind the rock to which he would appear on and Lena crept around to get Bilbo's attention.

The hobbit was shocked to see Lena's face in the shadow and puzzled when she pressed her finger to her lips to keep quiet about her presence. He looked back at the trolls then back at her to see her moving her lips and arms about her. Then he realized at she was trying to tell him something…

And ear…

A finger moving around in a circle…

A…frozen thing…

"We ain't got all night. Dawn ain't far away. Let's get a move on. I don't fancy being turned to stone." One of the trolls spoke and the look on Lena's face gave away the answer.

Buy time until the morning.

"Wait!" The hobbit cried, trying to get to his feet. "You are making a terrible mistake." The others protested at he hopped to his feet, getting the trolls attention.

"I meant with the seasoning."

"What about the seasoning?" One of the trolls asked the hobbit.

"Well, have you smelt them? You're gonna need something stronger than sage before you plate this lot up." Bilbo answered cleverly but that seemed to only anger the dwarves even more.

"What do you know about cooking dwarf?" One of the other trolls asked.

"Shut up. Let the flurgaburburhobbit talk." Lena rolled her eyes with a smile at the name they had given her friend.

"The secret to cooking dwarf is…" Bilbo was stuck.

"Yes? Come on. Tell us the secret." Lena believe the troll's name is Bert, asked.

"It's, uh…" Bilbo looked cautiously over at Lena to see what looked like she was cutting her arm? Then peeling something away? What…oh… "The secret is…to…skin them first." Lena giggled silently at another outrage of the dwarves.

"Tom, get me filleting knife." Bart said with a sly smile.

"What a load of rubbish. I've eaten plenty with their skins on. Scarf them, I say…boots and all." Said the troll turning the spit fire.

"He's right. Nothing wrong with a bit of raw dwarf. Nice and crunchy." Tom said, picking up Bombur by his feet. Bilbo quickly looked over at Lena who looked panicked and started to cough. Bilbo gave her a look and she acted out like she was…sick?

"Oh, not that one!" Bilbo spoke up. "He's infected!"

"Huh?" Tom looked shocked at the hobbit.

"You what?" One of the other trolls went.

"Yeah, he's got worms in his tubes."

"Eww!" Tom let go of Bombur with a disgusted face.

"In fact, they all have. They're infested with parasites. It's a terrible business. I wouldn't risk it. I wouldn't." Bilbo said.

"Parasites? Did he say 'parasites?'" Oin asked and soon everyone was denying that they were sick until Lena's eyes caught hold of Thorin. Their eyes lock and Lena nodded her head towards Bilbo with a smile. That look she gave him made him kick the back of Kili's body to let the others know to play along. "I've got parasites as big as my arm."

Thorin's eyes never left Lena after that, of how she communicated with Bilbo and tried to make something up before Gandalf stood at the top of the rock, booming his powerful voice, "The dawn will take you all."

"Who's that?"

"No idea."

"Can we eat him too?"

And with a stomp of his staff the rock cracked in half, allowing the dawns light to shower over them. It looked painful, watching the trolls turn to stone but they were going to kill them. Eat or be eaten. Once the trolls were fully turned to stone Gandalf came down from the rock, telling Lena to take care of the others in the bags while he took care of those who were tied onto the spit. Lena wrapped her arms around Bilbo before setting him free with a smile.

"You are bloody brilliant you know that?" Bilbo asked Lena who smiled greatly. Together they set the others free and Bilbo left Lena to take care of Thorin on purpose. Even he could see that after his little outburst at her that he needed to make things right.

But Bilbo touched the pocket of his jacket lightly for it weigh heavily on his mind.

The letter…

The one that explained everything…

Bilbo shook his head and returned to what was around him. She would be the one to tell the others, it was her right after all but that didn't make him feel any better for keeping it. Her step-father was a man of pure evil, doing something like that to Lena. Then again…how could her mother allow a man like that into her life at all?

There are some questions Bilbo didn't want an answer for, for the fear of knowing the truth was far greater than what his mind could come up with.

"Lena…are you alright?" Lena's pocket knife that Dwalin had taught her how to defend herself with sliced easily to free the dwarf king. When he got to his feet he ached to take the woman in his arms but he didn't want to scare her again. Lena nodded and noticed that the others had moved away from them, helping the others who were on the spit instead of staying close to them. "Forgive me…about earlier. I did not mean to snap at you or frighten you. It was not my intention." He said, his eyes cast downwards but her soft hand took his own, his eyes coming up to see that hers were not of anger. "You should be angry with me." Lena shook her head. "Why?"

"I…can't…" She spoke and made to stop her from talking but she held up her hand. "You do not…know…but I will…tell you…later…" Thorin was taken back but he was hopeful. Lena was opening up to him and he will soon know the truth to why she flinches around him.

"Lena…you do not have to unless you are ready to tell me." Thorin said and the grip she had on his hand tightened.

"You need to know." Her voice was soft and he wanted to hear more of it but he didn't want to cause her to be in any pain. She smiled at him but it was a sly smile before her lips quickly met his cheek. He marveled at the feel of her lips upon his cheek, closing his eyes to enjoy the feel of them before she pulled away. "I promise."

And with that she was gone, helping the others get to their feet and making sure none were badly hurt or burned. Every single one of them gave her a hug and for once Lena didn't flinch badly. She put on a brave face when Fili and Kili rushed at her to embrace her in a tight hug. Even Dwalin gave her a tight hug when Bilbo had said that if it wasn't Lena hiding in the bushes giving him ideas to buy time they would all be done for.

"Brave thinking lass." Oin said to her with a smile. Lena nodded her head but patted Bilbo on the back too.

"He…part of…it." Bilbo blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. Thorin called out then that they needed to gather their things, go back to their camp, and be on the move towards the troll's cave that must be near. Lena almost threw up her empty stomach when they neared it. The stench was too powerful for her so she stayed behind with some of the others.

"Lena are you alright?" Lena turned her head to see Fili and Kili standing by her. She nodded her head, grateful that she had her notebook again. She gave them a look and they returned one with sly smiles. "Well we just happen to see you and our uncle."

She froze.

"And we also happened to see that you gave him something as well."

Lena felt like she was going to die or more likely burn into ash with the fire she felt on her face.

"Brother! Look how red she's getting!" Lena stood up at their laughs and tried to push them away but they were built like brick houses. "Come on Lady Lena. No need to hide from us. We simply came to say thank you." Lena glared at them but Fili spoke up.

"We haven't seen our uncle act like that. When you left the camp I mean. He kept pacing and worrying about you and when you kissed his cheek…I don't think I've ever seen him so content before." Fili spoke softly and the fire returned back to Lena's face.

"You care about our uncle do you not?" Kili asked and Lena nodded her head before writing again in her notebook.

" _I do. I've never felt like this before and he makes me feel safe. I've grown to love the company like a family. The two of you, and Bilbo are more like brothers to me. Everyone else like uncles but Thorin…_ " They saw her pause before continuing. " _We both know I am human and not even a royal but I do care for him. I wish to see him smile more and laugh like that one day but if he does not return the feelings I understand why. I'm not saying I love him for anything but I do deeply care about him._ " Lena wrote and the two brothers hugged her tightly once more.

"Uncle does deeply care about you as well Lena." Kili said.

"He does not care if you are human at all. I know that all he cares about is that you're safe and happy as well." Fili said and Lena could feel tears in her eyes so she swatted the boys who simply chuckled. "We should get back with the others."

The three of them then went to stand with the others when Thorin came back from the troll cave. In his hands was a sword of legend and Lena smiled at him when he showed her what he had found. But it was short lived when something started to come towards them from the bushes.

"Something's coming!" Thorin called out, taking Lena's hand in his own as Gandalf called for everyone to stay together. Thorin told Lena to stay behind him and Dwalin when suddenly large…bunnies pulling a sled burst from the brush.

"Thieves! Fire! Murder.

"Radagast. It's Radagast the Brown. Well…what on earth are you doing here?" Gandalf asked.

"I was looking for you, Gandalf. Something's wrong. Something terribly wrong." Radagast said.

"Yes?"

"Just give me a minute." The wizard said when he couldn't remember right away what he wanted to the tell the gray wizard. "Oh. I had a thought and now I've lost it. It was right there…on the tip of my tongue." The he started to stick his tongue out. "Oh, it's not a thought at all. It's just an old stick insect." Gandalf took the bug off his friends' tongue and Lena shook her head before sitting down on the nearest rock. There's nothing she could do right at this moment.

The two wizards then went off some ways to talk alone so that the others wouldn't hear but Lena knew what they were talking about. She sat next to Thorin on the same rock but cried out softly in pain when Radagast drew out the blade from the dark times. Her head felt like someone was taking a hammer and nail to it but when Thorin tried to ask her what was wrong something called out, echoing a dreaded howl through the woods.

"Was that a wolf? Are there wolves out there?" Bilbo questioned.

"Wolves? No, that is not a wolf." Bofur said and everyone turned around when a deep growl sounded behind them. The warg bounded down the hill right towards Thorin when just then another come came towards him but Kili's arrow made it stumble, allowing Dwalin to have the killing blow.

"Warg scouts. Which means an Orc pack is not far behind." Thorin said.

"Orc pack?" Bilbo asked.

"Who did you tell about your quest beyond your kin?" Gandalf demanded.

"No one." Thorin answered.

"Who did you tell?!" Gandalf yelled.

"No one I swear." Thorin said. "What in Durin's name is going on?"

"You are being hunted." Gandalf answered him.

"We have to get out of here." Dwalin said but Ori spoke up.

"We can't. We have no ponies. They've bolted."

"I'll draw them off." Radagast said.

"These are Gundabad Wargs. They will outrun you." Gandalf said but Radagast approached him with a smile.

"These are Rhosgobel rabbits. I'd like to see them try." And with that they were on the move.

Lena swore she should have paid more attention to gym class or rather tried to stay in shape after school. More jogging/ running would have helped her greatly right now but she couldn't dwell on that now as she ran right behind Thorin. He told her as they grabbed their things that she is not to ever let go of his hand and to always stay within reach of him or Dwalin. She nodded and together they ran. Gandalf was directing them but Radagast was trying to keep the orcs away from them as they made their way over the rocky valley. Ori almost got himself seen once and it seemed like they were mostly backtracking but Gandalf was hush about their destination.

Closer and closer Lena could feel that they were coming to the hidden passage where they could get into Rivendell safely. But of course one of the orcs split off from the others, sniffing out their scent as the beast and its master stood above their heads on a rock. Thorin nodded at Kili, trusting in his nephews' abilities to aim carefully.

But the beast wouldn't go quietly.

The main pack heard the dying screech and came running for them.

Lena's heart pounded painfully within her chest at they came to a stop at some large stones. Gandalf was nowhere to be seen and Thorin gave the order for Kili to shoot them at a distance while if they should come near, they would take care of the rest.

"Hold your ground!" Thorin commanded but Lena was looking all around not because she was scared; she knew what was going to happen but something in her heart knew something was off.

"This way you fools!" Gandalf shouted at them from the cluster of rocks and one by one they jumped into the hole. Lena's eyes caught hold of something in the distance and her heart almost stopped. One of the orcs had an arrow knocked, aimed directly at Thorin who was too busy to even noticed.

' _There was no archer…_ ' Lena thought as she looked from the archer to the king. ' _There wasn't supposed to be an archer…_ '

Everything then felt like it was going in slow motion then.

She called out Thorin's name just as she shoved him away with all her might.

A _thump_ sound felt sickening to her ears as Thorin's eyes widened, his mouth agape with shock and fear.

"Thorin." Lena whispered as her body fell backwards into the hole, the other dwarves there to catch her only to panic at the sight of a black arrow sticking out from her chest. The last thing she remembered before everything went back was the frightened faces of the others. Thorin was in her sight, tears in his eyes when hers finally closed…

~oOo~

_Hello everyone and welcome to the seven o'clock news. More information about the murder of Lena King has come forward. It seems that Lena's step-father strangled his step-daughter before setting the house on fire. Later reports show that it was smoke inhalation that killed Lena but it seems that she was unconscious when the house went up in flames. The police are now on the lookout for Nick Dorne who seemed to have escaped police custody. We believe he is armed and dangerous and we advise anyone not to approach him. If anyone is to have information on his man, please, call our tip line or the police._


	9. Of Things To Come

**"I see his eyes, bright with life and fire, and I know he won't stop fighting. Even if it's the kind of quiet fight on the inside that you can't always see. And I won't stop fighting either." ― Ally Condie, Matched**

~oOo~

" _Elf_

" **Dwarf"**

~oOo~

Thorin felt like his heart was bring ripped from his chest, stomped into the dirt, and then cast into the darkest hole. Gandalf and Oin were busying themselves, trying to help Lena while he simply stood to the side; watching her life slip through his fingers. She managed to catch him off balance, shoving him aside as the black arrow plunged itself into her chest.

An arrow that was meant for him.

"She is alive but barely. She is beyond my healing and she is fading fast. We must move quickly." Gandalf said just as Dwalin asked if they should follow the pathway behind them.

"Follow it of course." Bofur said and the company began to move.

"Hold on, Lena. We will find help for you." Oin said as he applied bandages to Lena's wound. Thorin went to pick up Lena but Gandalf stopped him.

"I will take her Thorin. Lead the company." He told the dwarf king but Thorin hesitated. His eyes never left the black arrow, thinking how close he came from being in her position. How it should be him and not her dying in a cave somewhere. "I will watch over her, I swear to you Thorin." The king nodded and turned away to go with the rest of the company. The wizard looked at the dying woman in his arms, careful not to cause any more harm to her as he moved through the tunnel. Gandalf couldn't help but look down at her pale face and think that Mahal would be most cruel to take her from one fire only to add her to another.

And of course, all the members of the company were being affected as well. One would turn his head to look behind only for his frown to deepen as they moved. The light at the end of the tunnel was not as comforting once they realized where they had ended up.

Rivendell.

The last homely house east of the sea.

"This was your plan all along." Thorin said to Gandalf. "To seek refuge with our enemy."

"You have no enemies here, Thorin Oakenshield. The only ill will to be found in this valley that which you bring yourself." Gandalf said to him.

"You think the elves will give our quest their blessing? They will try and stop us." Thorin countered.

"Of course they will. But we have questions that need to be answered and healing magic which we do not have. If you continue to debate this matter Lena will die. Now leave the talking to me for this requires some degree of charm and respect if we want them to help us." Gandalf said and took point as they made their way to Rivendell's gates. There at the gates they were met with guards as a tall, lanky elf with dark hair approached Gandalf with a smile but it held concern for the woman in his arms.

" _Mithrandir._ " The elf spoke.

"Ah, Lindir." Gandalf acknowledged the elf with a smile.

" _We heard you had crossed into the valley._ " Lindir said.

"I must speak with Lord Elrond. One of our company members is gravely wounded. She needs healing magic." Gandalf said, his voice strained as he looked down at the woman once more. Lindir motioned one of the guards to come forward but the company saw, drawing their weapons when he approached.

"Lord Elrond is not here but will return shortly. Please, allow us to take her to the healing rooms." Lindir said but the company was not having it.

"You're not taking her." Thorin growled, stepping forward but Gandalf's glare stopped him.

"Do you keep forgetting she is dying? She needs their aid, Thorin. She will not last for much longer." Gandalf said, before handing the woman to the guard who then nodded to the dwarves, solemnly before swiftly making his way to the healing rooms. Just as the guard left a horn shouted in the distance as the sounds of many hooves approached them.

Within a matter of moments Lord Elrond appeared, smiling down at his friend. They exchanged words in elvish before turning towards the dwarves where they too exchanged words. When Lord Elrond offered them food and shelter Gloin thought they were being insulted but thankfully Gandalf was nice enough to offer a translate.

"Lord Elrond, there is a human woman in the healing chambers that needs your help. She was injured when the orcs attacked our company. Please, you must help her." Gandalf said and Lord Elrond left his guests to go tend to the wounded. While Lord Elrond went to tend to Lena Lindir showed the dwarves where they might stay should they choose to accept their chamber but the company denied, saying that they would not leave Lena's side until they heard news of her. Of course it was not seemly but the dwarves did what they want so they waited.

And waited…

And waited…

Until Lord Elrond appeared from reappeared from her room with a frown on his face. What disturbed the company the most was that the elf lord was wiping his hands of blood. Lena's blood. Fear gripped their hearts as they waited with bated breath for good news to grace their ears.

"Your companion is alive. She is resting for the pain she was in was too much for her to take. I fear she will sleep for a day or so before waking but she will recover." The company left out the breath they were holding, bursting with joy of the good news. "However, I must question something I did find rather odd."

"What is it?" Thorin asked but it was more like a demand.

"The scars upon her body I have found are days to months to years old. Scars like these only point to that of abuse. To which hand caused them is the most troubling for I know dwarves treasure their women above all else. However, Lena, is not a dwarf but a human." Lord Elrond said, locking eyes with the dwarf king but the fire in his eyes only burned brighter.

"What did you say?" Thorin demanded.

"Lena's body is covered in scars, including the bruises around her neck, in the shape of ones hands. I would like to know of how she came by them." Lord Elrond said, his voice not wavering as the dwarves' hands reached for their weapons.

"You think that one of my men caused Lena harm?!" Arguing broke out then, each cursing in their own language before Bilbo had had enough. He shouted everyone to quiet down but that gave Thorin a chance to run past Lord Elrond to stop short of Lena's bed. The others followed him and froze as well. There on the bed lay Lena…

Her arms were above the blankets as they were pulled up to her chest to cover her.

This allowed the company to see clearly what Lena had been hiding from them for months.

Everyone could see the healing bruise necklace wrapped around her neck, the burn marks on her arms along with the faint traces of scars that happened years ago. The company could only imagine what other scars lay hidden under the blanket. What other secrets Lena had hidden from them?

"How…what happened to her?" Kili spoke in the silence as Thorin approached the bed. His eyes never left her neck. The bruise there will haunt him for the rest of his life. Who had harmed her while she was under his care, his watch?

"She wanted to tell you." Eyes turned towards Bilbo. "But she was scared of what you might think of her."

"And you would know this?" Thorin turned to the hobbit. "She would confine in you what she could not to others?! What do you know of what happened to her?!" Thorin rounded on the hobbit but was stopped by Dwalin.

"Back when she first got sick, the healer sent me to go give Lena a blanket. She didn't…have her scarf on when I came into the room so I saw the bruises. After that she made me promise not to tell any of you because she knew something like this would happen. She wanted to tell you, she really did but she was so scared." Bilbo reached into his pocket to pull out the letter addressed to them. "She wrote this…for me to read to you all but I…" Balin approached the hobbit, placing a hand on his shoulder before taking the letter. Balin stood in the middle of the room before speaking….

_To everyone…_

_Forgive me for I have not been truthful to you, to all of you. My arrival was not planned by Gandalf nor did I plan this at all myself. By now, if you are reading this letter then something must've happened to me or that it is time to tell you the truth._

_I am not from middle earth._

_I'm not from this world at all._

_I am from a different world all together. In the beginning I lived like a normal human but with the loss of my father at a young age things started to get worse. My mother remarried, trying to heal her broken heart and to help support us but the man lied to her. He was a monster. We never saw eye to eye, the man and I, and we fought with words until my mother died. I was with her when she died and he blamed me for surviving the accident that took her. I was left alone with my step-father to care for me._

_A month after my mother's funeral did his true nature come out. We fought like normal but this time, he raised his hand to me like it was easy to hit a child. After that, punishments for talking out of turn, not doing any cleaning or cooking, angering him, or even being in his presence when I was not wanted ranged from a slap in the face to a burn mark on my skin. He would burn me, holding it to me skin until tears rolled down my face or when he knew fully well that it would scar. A reminder to never do it again. Many people at my school wanted to say something but were to afraid so they held their tongue. But what I fear the most that will shock all of you is what I have not said._

_How I got here._

"Well?" Dwalin demanded when his brother stopped talking. Balin looked up from the paper with tears in his eyes and looked at his comrades.

"What does it say?" Thorin demanded this time.

"I died." Balin replied and Thorin's heart started to break before he looked over his should at the woman on the bed.

No _…_

_I died._

_I was so sick and tired of it all that I said no to him and he snapped. He strangled me, whacking me against the wall like I was a rag doll. It was like I weighed nothing but I guess what's what I get when he doesn't feed me well enough. I must've blacked out because all I remember is seeing the house I lived in going up in flames. I tried to escape but there was so much smoke I couldn't breathe right. The metal door knob burned me when I tried to leave so I was forced back deeper into the room before collapsing to the ground, trying to save as much air as possible._

_I remember it hurting so much…_

_But when my eyes closed I didn't feel any pain anymore. I felt weightless and warm. I remember someone woke me but I don't know how long I floated for but I could feel someone run their fingers through my hair saying that I had a job to do. My life wasn't finished yet. I woke up in a field where I met Gandalf who really didn't know about my situation but told me it was best I join you._

_Everything else I have told you all was the truth except how I came to the Shire. I hope you all will forgive me. I didn't mean to lie to any of you, I was just afraid of your reactions. I felt like I belonged somewhere in the first time in forever but now that you all know…I am even more afraid. Do not be hard on Bilbo for keeping this quiet for he acted on my behalf. He was in the dark just like the rest of you before he found out. I hope you all will understand._

_Forgive me, Lena._

The room was quiet for the longest time. Wordlessly Lord Elrond left the room to leave the dwarves to set up where they would be sleeping. They opted to sleeping outside of Lena's room, Thorin taking vigil watch over the woman. Gandalf had told them that the elves would be holding a dinner for them in a few days, more along the lines of allowing the dwarves to settle in before forcing them to have dinner with them. Thorin did not reply but continued to watch the sleeping woman.

Three days past and Lena had not woken from her sleep. She muttered here and there, tossing and turning in her sleep but Thorin was there to comfort her to sooth her back to sleep. Little did the dwarf king eat or sleep those three days. Balin tried to get him to rest but the king's fear would not be laid to rest until Lena was awake. However, when the time came for the dwarves to feast with Lord Elrond did Thorin have little choice. With one final look at Lena did Thorin leave the room to get ready.

~oOo~

_**(Dreaming)** _

_**Lena was in the dark…** _

_**It was cold, dark, and Lena was frightened…** _

_**Everywhere Lena looked it was nothing but blackness. But then a fire broke out and Lena was struck with fear. She was back at the house again, drowning in flames and silence screams. Everywhere she looked was a window with flames burning around her. She banged and banged on the glass until her voice gave out from screaming a silent scream. Lena felt like she was going mad until a door appeared out of nowhere. She quickly made her way to it but regretted it for it burned her hand. The engraving reminded her of the doorknob of her front door back in her world. Her heart pounded even faster as she panicked more and more…** _

_**There was no way out…** _

_**She'd die in this nightmare…** _

_**Taunting her…** _

" _ **You must fight this." Lena whipped her head around to find the voice but she couldn't. "Keep your mind Lena. This is nothing but a nightmare."**_

_**Lena took a deep breath, trying to calm down but it wasn't working. Her chest like it felt like it was going to explode as something lodged it's in her chest. A black arrow, sticking out of her chest dropped Lena to her knees as her world burned around her.** _

" _ **Stop…please let this stop…" Lena thought or spoke out loud but she could care less. She was going to die again…die in her own nightmare without telling Thorin…**_

_**Without telling Thorin…** _

_**Oh Thorin…** _

" _ **Stop this!**_ _ **" Lena screamed and a bright white flash surrounded Lena until she was dumped upon soft grass, a clear blue sky above her head, and birds chirping in her ear. Lena lay there, looking up at the sky as she tried to control her breathing as she stared at the arrow lodged in her chest. "Easy Lena, calm yourself." Lena's head was picked up and placed in someone's lap before a hand ran through Lena's hair. "Shhh shhh, easy now. This is nothing more than a nightmare." Lena slowed her breathing, taking even breaths until she looked back down at her chest to see that the arrow was now missing.**_

" _ **What…I can't…" Lena tried to speak but the person quieted her down.**_

" _ **You have been injured but you are strong. A darkness is coming for you Lena and you must fight it. Overcome your fear of the fire and your death." The voice said.**_

" _ **How?"**_

" _ **You will know. Now…wake up."**_

~oOo~

Lena gasped awake. She coughed until she felt like she was blue in the face until someone held a cup to her lips. Lena drank the water greedily before it was taken away for her. Lena blinked a few times before her vision focused on the female elf that stood over her.

"Welcome back lady Lena. Your friends have been worried about you." She said and helped Lena into a sitting position. Lena tried to open her mouth to form words but none would come. She moved her hand like she was writing something and the female elf guessed at what she was hinting at. The elf came back with a Lena's notebook and pen, watching as Lena wrote down the question to where the others were. "They are getting ready for dinner. Shall I got tell them you have awoken?" Lena shook her head.

Then started to get up from the bed.

"My lady, please! You are still weak and should not be moving! Lord Elrond has said that you must rest." She said but Lena ignored her, taking it slow and steady. Once the woman realized that Lena would not give up so easily she helped Lena to the bathroom to bathe. The woman told Lena that her name is Lamaenel and that she was assigned to Lena to help her in anyway. Lena found it odd to bathe with someone in the room but she knew it was because Lena could collapse at any time.

Once Lena was bathed Lamaenel helped Lena dress in a dark blue gown that tied in the back. Lamaenel was careful not to brush against her stitches. Sure, from just above her breasts you could see the bandages but Lena couldn't care less. She needed to get up and moving.

She needed to see Thorin and tell him.

Lamaenel was nice enough to dry her hair and do it up really nicely and before Lena knew it she was standing on weak legs looking at her reflection in the mirror. She could barely recognize herself but she looked…so different. And clean. Lena stumbled a little bit but she cleared her head enough to start walking. Lamaenel took Lena's hand in her own, helping her walk down the never ending tunnels of Rivendell.

It was something out of a painting.

All these pillars with vines wrapped around a few along with the smooth floor reflecting the setting sun's rays seemed to create a mystical feeling around them as they walked. Lena kept repeating to herself that she had to make it where they were having dinner. Her nightmare or dream only fueled her nerves to get up. She was done living in fear of that fire.

Living in fear of him.

"Wait!" Lena rasped out, halting their walking. They were just a few feet from where the others were eating, she could hear them whispering loudly with one another over the fact that there was nothing that they liked.

"What is wrong my lady?" Lamaenel asked Lena. Lena spoke Balin's name, trying to get the elf woman to understand what she was talking about so after a few tries Lamaenel kind of guessed what she was talking about then left. Within a few moments the elf returned with the silver haired dwarf whose jaw dropped once he saw her.

"Lena. You're…you're awake. And walking. You should be resting my dear." Balin said as he approached her. Lena smiled and gently shook her head. Balin knew that she shouldn't be up let alone trying to talk. "Come along my dear. I'm sure the others will be happy to see you up and about." Balin said and she took his arm. Together they took their time until they reached doorway or archway where the others were. "Look who came to eat with us lads." Balin announced. All at once they turned around but then swiftly got to their feet. She smiled at them before looking over to where Thorin stood, his mouth agape, and his eyes locked with her.

Soon…

Soon she will tell him…


End file.
